Image via Complex Original
Sun's out, guns out. So goes the old saying. With summer officially here, the clothing choices for guys have become super limited. Since we all can't go running around with our shirts off 24/7, that leaves the question: To sleeve, or not to sleeve? The basic T-shirt looks good on any guy, but the tank top is tricky territory. They're hard to pull off unless you have decent-looking arms, are really only appropriate for a limited number of occasions, and there are even some basic archetypes of dudes that wear them. Don't believe us? We broke it down for you. Here are The 10 Types of Men Who Wear Tank Tops.
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10. Dudes That Actually Say "Do You Even Lift?"
You're reading this between reps. You have arms as wide as your face, and have never heard of The Sartorialist, but can go on for hours about the sartorius. Your neck probably has its own abs.
9. Of-the-Moment Celebrities
From landing big ticket roles that launch them into superstardrom, or rappers who have been on some key features on guaranteed hit songs, these guys are what the media deems "hot right now." Speaking of heat, these same people opt for sleeveless shirts when the whether gets warm, for some reason only when the paparazzi seems to be around.
8. Hipsters at Corny Events
You love going to dumb pool parties on hotel rooftops even though you don't own anything you can swim in. You just go there to pound beers and listen to whatever indie band du jour is blaring through the speakers. You take this to the next level and go to music festivals because seeing someone live is the only thing better than hearing it on vinyl. You never met a pair of croakies you didn't like.
7. Streetwear Bros in the Summer
You go to events like Fool's Gold Day Off and the Mad Decent Block Party even though you don't really fuck with the music. It's just an excuse to throw on the Js with a pair of shorts and hang out in a vacant lot with your boys, starting at girls you don't have the courage to actually talk to. Also, this is one of the few times anyone will see all of your arm tats.
6. Dudes Mowing the Lawn
Farmer's tan is for amateurs.
5. 50 Cent
When "In The Club" was hot, he could walk into any swanky place and all of a sudden white tank tops would be deemed appropriate. Also, no other dudes ever embraced the non-ribbed straps quite like 50.
4. Douchey Frat Bros
You wear tank tops because they complement your puka shell necklace, cargo shorts, and well-worn brown flip-flops. Sometimes you throw on a pre-frayed baseball cap with the perfect curved brim, just to switch it up. You also watched Jersey Shore out of sheer adoration.
3. Richard Simmons
There are tank tops, and then there are Richard Simmons tank tops. If there was such a thing as "next level tanks," his would take the cake. From tasseled versions, tie-dye, to all gold everything joints, Richard Simmons is the tank top KING.
2. Your Dad
Look, your dad has earned the right to wear a tank top regardless of his body type. Whether he's had a hard day at work and likes to kick back in his undershirt and enjoy a beer, or he's on vacation enjoying a Mai Tai poolside, let dad do his thing.
1. Vin Diesel
Fact: It's harder to find a photo of Vin not wearing a tank top than it is of him in a sleeveless shirt. Every other character he plays refuses to wear sleeves as if it were a clause in his contract. We're just waiting for the day his arms get an Oscar nod for "Best Supporting Actor."