Image via Complex Original
The things we do in the name of our sports fandom. With the NBA kicking off last week, hysteria returns to the hardcourt as we once again cringe at every wild J.R. Smith shot, dismay at the crumbling of Kobe's L.A. Lakers, and wait with bated breath at the inevitable Derrick Rose season-ending injury.
Sure, these fans probably had nothing but honorable intentions when they decided to sit down and permanently put their team on their sleeve, but even the best intention can fall flat—some are even worse than the Milwaukee Buck' win percentage last season. These are 15 Terrible NBA Fan Tattoo Fails.
Smooshed
Team Referenced: Miami Heat/Cleveland Cavaliers
It's a well known fact that LeBron's had some issues with his hairline receeding, but we didn't know the rest of his face was too. It appears as though the artist felt a little cramped against the other “colorful” tatoos, and proceeded to compress all of James' face—with the hair sliding up, and the rest of his features sliding down.
A Kiss Between Barkley and Bavetta
Team Referenced: N/A
This is a tatto of Charles Barkley (during his analyst days) kissing longtime NBA ref Dick Bavetta. No you're not going crazy. A challenge posed to viewers of TNT's Inside the NBA, then-new analyst Shaquille O'Neal promised as the show was going to commercial: “Anybody out there who gets that tattoo, I’ll give you $1000 dollars. Tweet me back with the pictures.”
A “Hair” of Disappointment
Team Referenced: Miami Heat/Cleveland Cavaliers
Even the tattoo looks disappointed to be covered by all that hair. Even LBJ himself didn't know how to feel about the tattoo, saying on Instagram, “I guess that’s pretty cool/creepy/awesome all the same time!” (Notice how he snuck “creepy” in the middle there?)
“Love is Love”
Team Referenced: New York Knicks
Yes that's a picture of Stephon Marbury in the twilight of his career (post-vaseline eating). Yes there's Starbury's recently-adopted motto “love is love” right below. It's hard to believe that even someone who really “loves” Stephon Marbury would get this police-sketch-esque portrait.
A Bout of Linsanity
Team Referenced: New York Knicks
When the Knicks reached peak “Linsanity” levels in 2012 everyone, whether a fan of Knicks or not, was falling into the hype. When this fan got the tattoo, it was same as Lin's number 17 jersey with Knicks colors. Unfortunately, since Jeremy Lin both no longer plays for the Kincks and wasn't wearing number 17 (something reinstated after moving to the Lakers), this tattoo is nothing more than a fail.
Overheated
Team Referenced: Miami Heat
Not only is the layout of these tattoos bizarre, but why is the Jordan icon a spitting silhouette of Fat Albert?
“I Slept With Shaq”
Team Referenced: N/A
SMH.
Mount “Inside the NBA”
Team Referenced: N/A
SMFH.
Zombified
Team Referenced: Boston Celtics
It's a Boston Celtic that's a shell of its former self. Which reminds us…
Championship Taste
Team Referenced: San Antonio Spurs
Sure, it's exciting that the Spurs have recently added their fifth championship, making them one of the winningest franchises in basketball—but maybe a tattoo to the dome wasn't the best way to celebrate. That's why they have championship T-shirts right?
Black Mamba
Team Referenced: Los Angeles Lakers
The reference to Kobe's “Black Mamba” nickname is obvious, but it's disappointing that Staples Center has to look like an awkward kindergarten drawing in the background.
Dunking into a Waffle
Team Referenced: New York Knicks
We can't seem to decide what's worse, the fact that Robinson has no lips, that his lower body looks like it's sucked into his torso, or that he's attempting to dunk into a flattened waffle.
Wiz Kid
Team Referenced: Washington Wizards/Washington Bullets
The references are here, from the bullets in the purple smoke to the classic "DC" logo with the arm reaching for the basketball. Unfortunately, his tattoo looks like Napoleon Dynamite was working the shop when he asked for this one.
Unflattering Imitation
Team Referenced: New York Knicks
If you're going to completely copy a player's tattoo, you might as well go through with it. The fan, Michael Cooper, added his spin to J.R. Smith's neck tattoo, changing "Young Money" to "Cooper Star." J.R.'s inherent "realness" makes the ink work. Clearly, it doesn't have the same effect for Cooper.
Charlie Villanueva's Lasting Impression
Team Referenced: Detroit Pistons
Sure Charlie Villanueva was a decent player, albeit not necessarily a stand out player, during his time at the Pistons, but we have a feeling you'll never forget his image after you see this creepy attempt at an homage.