The Best Fake NBA Trades That Work on ESPN's Trade Machine

Anything is possible in the NBA. Over the years, we've seen rosters quickly overturned and CBA rules bent and skewed so that GMs can get almost any deal done. The Rockets went from Kevin Martin and Luis Scola as their two best players in 2011 to James Harden and Dwight Howard leading the way in 2013. If GMs are patient and shrewd enough, that can happen to almost any team (except for the jackass Knicks).

Inspired by the likes of the Rockets, Knicks, Nets, and Suns, who have put together the core of their teams through trades, we shuffled through ESPN's NBA Trade Machine (if you're a basketball junkie who also enjoys long hours of Candy Crushing, do not open that link at work) to address a few major issues for a select bunch of teams. We were able to deal Rajon Rondo to the Pacers, Carmelo Anthony to the Warriors, and Kevin Love to the Raptors in trades that not only make sense in real life, but also pan out in the Trade Machine. Check out the Best Fake NBA Trades That Work on ESPN's Trade Machine.

The Celtics trade Rajon Rondo, Gerald Wallace, and Jeff Green for Ben Gordon, Ramon Sessions, Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, and Kemba Walker

Don't look now, but it's Michael Jordan going for it all! Let's take a breather for a minute though—why would the Bobcats want to trade for win-now types of players? Let's think this through. They're the Bobcats. Like every season until their savior emerges, aren't they trying to tank for the lottery? Don't they suck? Yeah, but have you checked the standings? They're currently the 7th seed in the East. Honestly, that means jack shit, and they'd probably be better off tanking, but Jordan has made worse decisions for the Bobcats in the past. Would any of the six Bobcats fans down in Charlotte really be mad at the franchise's first honest attempt at winning?

The Celtics, on the other hand, go into full tank mode with this trade. The expiring contracts of Ben Gordon and Ramon Sessions shed just over $18 million instantly from their cap sheet, which is about the amount they owed Gerald Wallace and Jeff Green per season over these next three years. Celtics fans probably want the world for Rondo, but getting back an explosive young scorer still on his rookie deal in Kemba Walker and the No. 2 overall pick in the 2012 Draft in Michael Kidd-Gilchrist is a sweet return. Brad Stevens coaching up Kidd-Gilchrist could produce fantastic results in 2014.

Rockets trade Omer Asik to the Hawks for Paul Millsap

Before Al Horford's injury, this trade made so much sense that it was upsetting that it didn't happen before the injury. Now, the Hawks will probably be reluctant to trade their other star big man—they're third in the Eastern Conference as it stands, and will want to maximize their rare opportunity to make a run against weak Eastern Conference playoff opposition. That being said, Omer Asik is a defensive pillar, and would cause massive problems for the powerful interior lines of the Pacers and Pistons, and disrupt the Heat's offense a la Roy Hibbert.

It's harder to quantify Asik's direct impact statistically, especially compared to Millsap's solid 17.7 PPG and 8.8 RPG 2013-2014 average, but contending that Asik's defense is more valuable than Millsap's scoring wouldn't be a losing argument by any means. For the Rockets, they rid themselves of the Asik headache while getting a quality power forward to compliment Dwight Howard. Boom. Western Conference Finals, anyone?

Rockets trade Jeremy Lin and Omer Asik to the Lakers for Pau Gasol.

With the Pau Gasol for Andrew Bynum trade falling through, the Lakers are seemingly out of options. If Bynum, who the Lakers were going to release anyway, is what the market is bearing for Gasol right now, they might as well keep him. It doesn't seem like the Lakers can get any non-toxic assets in return for him. But wait, the Rockets have a few of those lying around, and they're only semi-toxic! Still butt-hurt by the Dwight Howard move, Omer Asik is on a sort of injury recovery/strike right now from the Rockets, and they've been desperately trying to move him for a month now. Perhaps two ugly ducklings can come together and make some magic here!

On a basketball level, the Lakers would get a year and a half of watching Lin run pick-and-roll with Bob Sacre back in Mike D'Antoni's system *Knicks fans nod solemnly*. Putting one of the game's best rim protectors in Asik upgrades a Lakers defense that's currently 28th in points allowed per game at 104.2. Plus, Lin and Asik are going into the final year of their contracts next season, giving the team enough cap space to pursue Kevin Love in the 2015 free agent period.

The Rockets might be hesitant to pair Gasol and Howard together again, but Rockets coach Kevin McHale will absolutely do a better job at utilizing Gasol alongside Howard than D'Antoni did last season. (Hint: Don't put a 7-footer anywhere near the perimeter for 36 minutes with no pick-and-roll calls and expect results.)

The only detail that would hold up this deal are Asik and Lin's contracts. Because Rockets GM Daryl Morey structured each contract to be worth small amounts in the first two seasons, and then a whopping $15 million each in the final year, which is next season (sneaky bastard). There's a sentiment around the league that Morey took advantage of new provisions in the CBA that allowed these "poison pill" years, and that he's trying to wiggle out of paying $30 million combined to Asik and Lin in 2014-2015. The league could collectively give Morey the finger and not trade for either, but these teams would address pressing needs in this deal.

Timberwolves trade Kevin Love and J.J. Barea for Kyle Lowry, Landry Fields, and Jonas Valančiūnas

Operation #SaveKevinLove is very real. It's cool that the Timberwolves drafted well and ended up with the best power forward in basketball, but nobody outside of Minnesota is trying to watch T'Wolves games. It feels wrong to say, but Love is too good for a cold small market without any substantial basketball history. That last sentence may be applicable to the Raptors' situation as well, but something is happening up in Toronto. Between Anthony Bennett (okay, well maybe not Anthony Bennett), Andrew Wiggins, and now Drake, Canadian basketball is making a come up. Queen Mary's tax rates will always be a killer for American ballers with any inkling to sign in the Great White North, but screw it—let's get Kevin Love up in Canada!

The Raptors are confusingly good right now, but just "good" in the Eastern Conference actually means bad in the context of the rest of the league *looks longingly out West*. Raptors GM Masai Ujiri wanted to tank for Wiggins this year, but coach Dwane Casey, who was appointed before Ujiri was hired, is rallying his players to save his own job and their next contracts. Building around DeMar DeRozan, Kevin Love, and Terrence Ross with cap space going forward and Drake's ability to lure potential free agent signings (he did get Jermain Defoe to sign with Toronto FC with one phone call, after all) would be a nice and quick rebuild for the Raptors. The Timberwolves may feel shafted here, but Jonas Valančiūnas plus a few first round picks is a nice value haul for a player who will likely walk out of Minnesota in the summer of 2015.

Thunder trade Kendrick Perkins and Jeremy Lamb to the Magic for Arron Affalo

The Thunder are a smart organization in the eyes of the NBA. And it's true. They've hauled in Kevin Durant, Russell Westbrook, James Harden, and Serge Ibaka through the draft, and will be the favorites to win the Western Conference so long as Durant remains in Oklahoma City. They're a model franchise, but they're also cheap. They're refusal to pay James Harden and creep into the current CBA's harsh luxury tax penalties has argubaly cost them a title, or at the very least, supreme dominance of every non-LeBron team in the NBA. Here's a fun fact: No NBA team has ever won an NBA title without paying the luxury tax in it's modern form. Money wins championships. Right now, the Thunder are sliding just below the tax line, and it's working out well—for now. The Thunder are elite. But they could be 15 percent better if they wanted to spend, which is scary.

The rapid development of Reggie Jackson and the sweet-shooting of Jeremy Lamb has given the Thunder some semblance of a third scoring option, but the two are best left on the bench for any team with title-aspirations. The Magic are violently tanking at the moment, and would likely welcome any deal to suck even more. Arron Afflalo for Lamb alone makes sense, but Perkins' contract is a soon-to-be expiring mini-albatross, and his actual play will definitely make the Magic 10,000 percent worse.

The Thunder have a clear choice: Either wait for Lamb or Jackson to develop into Harden-level players (unlikely), or near that (unlikely as well) while also concurrently pissing off Durant and Westbrook for ownership's lack of ambition and surplus of frugality. Or, they can spend like champions win a title before either Durant or Westbrook get bored with the Great Plains and bolt. Red or blue pill?

Thunder trade Kendrick Perkins and Jeremy Lamb to the Raptors for DeMar DeRozan

Again: Spend like champions or pretend to be champions? It's all in the Thunder's hands. If the Magic decide they already suck enough to get deep into the lottery with Arron Affalo, Thunder GM Sam Presti should hit up the Raptors. If Masai Ujiri rightly calls bullshit on the entire winning on the floor operation with the current Raptors and decides to gut the team further to get into the lottery, shipping off DeMar DeRozan to OKC would be a great start. A young core of Jonas Valančiūnas, Terrence Ross, and Jeremy Lamb, plus whoever they get in the draft would certainly please Grand Master Uriji, and hopefully restore winning basketball in Toronto.

Knicks Trade Carmelo Anthony to the Suns For Emeka Okafor, Channing Frye, and Two 1st Round Picks

If the Knicks wanted to trade Carmelo Anthony for fear of him curving them for non-dysfunctional pastures in the summer, this trade might realistically be what the market holds. No team wants to overpay for Anthony when they can sign him in six months (ironically, that's exactly what the Knicks did when they traded for Anthony in 2011). The Suns have expressed their desire to pool their assets and draft picks into a superstar, so if Anthony was willing to go down to Phoenix and re-sign there (obviously, any Anthony trade hinges on his willingness to sign a contract extension with his new club), they would be a perfect match for the Knicks.

Emeka Okafor's neck injury has kept him off the floor all season, but his $14,487,500 expiring contract is a nice salary dump. Channing Frye would come back to the Knicks here, shoring up a thin frontline. His contract also expires next season, which lines up perfectly with the Knicks current cap sheet—they only have $12,674,322 in committed salaries in 2015, and with a loaded free agent pool that summer (LaMarcus Alridge, Rajon Rondo, Kyrie Irving, Ricky Rubio, Kevin Love, and Roy Hibbert will be out there), they'll have a shot to sign one or two max contract stars. But the real big man in the deal is Miles Plumee, who's averaging a double-double per game as a first-year starter in the NBA. He's exactly the type of player the Knicks need more of—young, cheap, but still productive.

The whole trade feels like an underwhelming haul for a Top 10 NBA talent, but the Suns have six first round picks over the next two drafts, including four in this year's much-hyped class. One or two of those would put Knicks GM Steve Mills over the moon. If I was Mills right now, I'd be phoning up Suns GM Ryan McDonough day and night to make this deal happen. Given the way this season has gone, and the fact that the rotation doesn't stand to change much next year, it's time the Knicks burn the ship before it sinks, and start running the franchise like a sane person—value draft picks, affordable young talent, and patience. Fans today are too smart for any other bullshit, much less Dolan's confused agenda of paying to win now without winning players and coaches.

Warriors trade David Lee and Festus Ezeli to the Suns for Emeka Okafor, Marcus Morris, and Miles Plumlee

Similar to the previous Carmelo Anthony deal, but Marcus Morris' small-ball power forward play and great three-point stroke (he's shooting 39.7 percent from three this season) would be a better fit for the Warriors than Channing Frye. The upstart Suns seem intent on following the Rockets' model of staying competitive while pooling assets for a superstar rather than bottoming out and hoping a few ping pong balls bounce their way in the Draft Lottery. David Lee isn't Anthony, but he's not a bad consolation prize either. Who's ready for Lee, Goran Dragic, and Eric Bledsoe to make some noise?!

The Warriors do this deal in an attempt to clear cap space, as Andrew Bogut's $36 million contract extension kicks in next season, and they have yet to sign Klay Thompson and Harrison Barnes to long-term deals. David Lee is the oldest and highest paid member of the Warriors, making him the odd man out. Seems like a solid win-win.

Celtics trade Rajon Rondo to the Pacers and Jordan Crawford to the Suns, Pacers trade Danny Granger and George Hill to the Suns, and Lance Stephenson to the Celtics, and the Suns trade Emeka Okafor to the Celtics and Goran Dragic to the Pacers.

Want to severely shake up the balance of power in the East? Get Rajon Rondo on the Pacers! One through five, the Pacers have a balanced, hard-nosed defensive team, but one that's reliant on Paul George and Lance Stephenson to initiate offense off the dribble. George Hill plays his part within the system on both ends of the floor, but he's not a sexy player, and the ESPN NBA Trade Machine is all about those sexy names and salaries. In short: the Pacers wouldn't be off base for wanting to upgrade on George Hill. Rondo's creativity and defense is elite at the point guard position. Don't forget, this is the same Rondo who nearly carried the AARP Celtics past the Heat in the 2012 playoffs.

The Celtics deal Rondo for cap flexibility and well, because you don't just blow up a house and leave the living room standing. He's the only member of the Doc Rivers Big Three+1 Era left. Lance Stephenson is a great young chip to get back in return too, and could take his game to the next level with an offense all to his own along with Brad Stevens' coaching. The Suns, who are now chasing star players and good contracts, would gladly take Danny Granger's expiring deal (anything he offers on the court is a bonus too), George Hill's stability at point guard, and Jordan Crawford's wildness off the bench for Emeka Okafor and Goran Dragic.

Okay, Let Me Explain...

Imagine if this shit went down? It actually makes sense for all parties involved, but this trade involves so many huge names and even bigger contracts, and since some NBA GMs are increasingly working to protect their jobs rather than advance their teams, this one is merely a 2K14 fantasy. It all starts with the assertion that the Knicks want to move Carmelo Anthony ASAP, because they fear that he'll walk on them this summer. They also would like to upgrade on an aging and quickly deteriorating Tyson Chandler either through acquiring younger players or through free agency. But to move a 31-year-old, injury-plagued center owed $14.1 million next season, the Knicks would need to use Iman Shumpert as bait.

With the players the Knicks are getting in return for Anthony, Chandler, and Shumpert, they're absolutely improving on paper. Moving Anthony and Chandler allows Andrea Bargnani to truly take over at the four, ending the Knicks' weird battle for floor spacing with all three of those bigs on the floor. A starting five of Raymond Felton, Klay Thompson, Andre Iguoldala, Andrea Bargnani, and Al Horford is more balanced on paper, gives the Knicks a legitimate two-way shooting guard/small forward in Igoludala, and makes them younger. Horford is currently injured with a torn pectoral, but given the Knicks' current record, a postseason run may already be lost for this season. If the Knicks can somehow flip Felton into anything other than Felton in the summer, watch out for the James Dolan-Steve Mills ticket in 2016.

The Warriors catch Anthony, giving the number two team in isolation possession percentage (the Knicks are number one) one of, if not the best one-on-one player in the league. A Stephen Curry-Carmelo Anthony tandem would provide an absurd amount of offensive firepower, although an Alpha Dog battle may ensue until Anthony remembers what it's like to play alongside another scoring superstar for the first time since Allen Iverson. Millsap is an upgrade over an older and more expensive David Lee, and Kyle Korver's three-point shooting will help erase the memory of Thompson at Oracle Arena.

Chandler and Lee are instant injections of star front court talent for the Hawks, who are juggling through the last remains of Elton Brand, 31-year-old rookie Pero Antic, and 2012 second round pick Mike Scott as Horford's replacements. By default, the Hawks are the third best team in the Eastern Conference, and while this trade won't change that, it'll certainly make them more than a second round playoff afterthought. I'll take Chandler and Lee banging bodies inside against the likes of Chris Bosh and Roy Hibbert over the Brand-Antic-Scott Megashit.