Image via Complex Original
Citibike has only existed in New York City since May 27, 2013. In those few short months, it has polarized this city like few other ventures. Some loath it, some celebrate it, and some are willing to spend small fortunes to see its demise. Regardless of your feelings on CitiBike, it has permenently changed the way New Yorkers view and access the City. And it has brought a lot of drama with it. We present: the dumbest CitiBike incidents so far.
RELATED: Leonardo DiCaprio Just Made CitiBikes 100 Times Cooler
Early Adopters Are Keyless
Annual members of CitiBike get a key that allows them quicker access to bikes. The keys themselves were anything but quick for the first 3-4 weeks of operation. Instead of the quoted 7-10 day delivery time, keys were arriving closer to 20-25 days. At least their 365-day membership didn't officially start until they activated the key.
CraigslistBike
A bicycle that looked suspiciously like a photoshopped stock photo of a CitiBike showed up on Craigslist one day. It claimed to have been used for at least a year, but the seller was unsure of how to fill the tires with air. All for $100, or the cost of an annual membership!
Info Leak
1,174 customer names, passwords, credit cards, and contact info were on public display due to an issue with CitiBike's software in the days leading up to its deployment. CitiBike does not believe the records were ever accessed maliciously, but it didn't signal a great start to the program.
Wealthy Residents Have Stations Moved Away From Their Homes
Money buys happiness, comfort, and can get a CitiBike station relocated faster than you can ride from Central Park to the Bowery. At least 10 stations have been moved from wealthy neighborhoods, because the residents found them to be eye sores and change is terrifying. The rich continue to own the city, and all is well.
ShitiBike
CitiBank has long suffered from the clever turn of phrase, where people substitute the "Citi" with a more fecal adjective. Wasting no time, "ShitiBike" stickers began appearing (and continue to appear) on the bikes within the first week.
Glue on the Seats
CitiBikes are the epitome of unprotected. They're exposed to every element, tourist, delivery truck and, sometimes, prankster in the city. These bikes became the victims of a "glue-like substance" near Thompkins Square Park in the East Village.
Wealthy Brooklynites Can't Find Parking
One of the inherent issues with CitiBike is that it assumes most docking stations will have a reasonable combination of ready-to-go bikes and empty docks. This is not always the case, as several commuters found out one day when riding downhill to Dumbo, the hip Brooklyn neighborhood beneath the Brooklyn and Manhattan bridges. They found themselves with all three docks in the area entirely full and nowhere close to park. Users took to Twitter to voice their outrage.
Food Carts Forced to Relocated
In the Financial District, three food trucks pulled up one morning to find their parking spots cannibalized by CitiBike docks. They were forced to find new, and lower quality locations in order to continue their operation.
Time is More Important than Health
There have been surprisingly few accidents yet involving CitiBike. One of the unlucky few, who was struck by a car, was more upset about the potential maximum late fee of $1,000 than he was of his injuries.
Ticket to Ride
Since the debut of CitiBike, tickets issued to Cyclists have soared, particularly in Brooklyn. Whether it's running a red light, riding on the sidewalk, or riding against traffic, bikes are more-or-less enforced like cars in the city, and many residents have paid the price to learn that.
"Cameras" in Bikes
A blog post by comedian John Powers briefly convinced the public that even CitiBike was spying on them. Thankfully, it was quickly was debunked as a joke.