Image via Complex Original
The Tour De France starts tomorrow and even though we want nothing to do with watching it (People think soccer is boring? Try tuning into this) we still love seeing people (who aren't us) wipeout. As one of the biggest sporting events on the summer calendar we thought we'd do our best to pay tribute to this great race that dates all the way back to 1903. We wouldn't be doing our due diligence if we didn't acknowledge this annual feat of cycling/doping excellence. Anyway, here's a bunch of people getting hurt on bikes. Some of them are pros, and some are just amateurs trying to enjoy their down time.
Luckily, both forms are entertaining to watch.
You get a bonus fail!!!!
This is how much we care about you. Originally we were going with 25; but here's an extra GIF of people getting seriously injured just to show our appreciation.
First person fail.
You know how you see those crazy messengers in the city all the time in constantly near misses, totally disregarding stoplights, one-way signs and the well-being of others?
Well, sometimes they connect.
Coming in hot!
If nothing else this list should get you to wear a helmet.
A rite of passage for every teenager:
Breaking a bone trying to impress the neighborhood.
Bike goes rafting.
Hopefully he's within walking distance of civilization.
Breaks his back mowing lawns to buy the bike and then...
There's some sort of Confucius line for this.
Security guard shows why he's a security guard.
The future for 'D' students everywhere.
The definition of a "bum deal."
As if this guy's life wasn't hard enough.
Know your audience.
For the "people who laugh at teens running into trees" demographic.
Reconfiguring the food chain.
When herbivores strike back.
One of the only girls in our countdown.
She should be really proud that she's shattering the glass ceiling along with her femur.
A metaphor for Lance Armstrong's career.
And we're sure she doesn't regret getting rocked by that car so some guy she never met could write that line on the internet.
When the guard rail fails to guard...
You get a spot on this list. Oh, and also a broken spine.
These don't get old.
And we're guessing neither did that cyclist.
The dog looks okay.
The front tire? Not so much.
If Kerr-McGee sponsored the biggest race in cycling.
Not sure if Tour De France or scene from Silkwood.
That first burst of freedom after you cut the training wheels.
Watching this brings back painful childhood memories, but at least some fuck didn't post us on YouTube and write "FAIL" in all caps.
A question that has plagued mankind for centuries:
What is it about a fat kid falling that makes us laugh instead of asking "are you okay?"
Nice of his friend to film it all.
Man, we bet he felt dumb every single one of his bones break.
What happens when you don't have your Red Bull?
Let this be your warning.
Avoid all distractions.
"Look at that beautiful sunset, it almost reminds you that what's important is--whoa....whoa..I got th--sonuvabitch, fuck!!!"
Let this be a lesson to any "would be" champions.
Honestly, of all the "fails" on the list, this is the worst. Wounds heal, broken bones mend and organs get transplanted but that victory?...It's gone forever.
