You know what's a super fun and totally not depressing thing to do? Reading through the salaries of famous humans! We already know that celebrated battler of candy asses Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson is the highest-paid movie star on the planet. Kevin Hart, having swiftly dethroned long-running champ Jerry Seinfeld, now stands as the highest-paid comedian. Hell, a lot of people are making so much money at fan conventions alone that they actually know what a trash bag full of $20s feels like. But what about TV, a format which has been undeniably killing it recently?
Varietycrunched the numbers and released its findings Wednesday, having surveyed everyone from the actors themselves to their respective attorneys. Though the numbers aren't down-to-the-penny exact (thanks to extenuating circumstances like backend fees and merchandising), Variety's so-called "snapshot" of all the money in TV is still good enough to make you feel fucking great about whatever you're doing for money.
The Rock joins the top earners on TV, proving dude can pretty much dominate in any field he chooses. Among comedy series stars, Johnson's per-episode salary lands him in the top five, bested only by a bunch of people on alleged television show The Big Bang Theory. Jonah Hill and Emma Stone, who will next star together in the Netflix series Maniac, also make strong showings on the list of highest-paid comedy actors on TV:
- Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory ($1 million)
- Kaley Cuoco, The Big Bang Theory ($1 million)
- Johnny Galecki, The Big Bang Theory ($1 million)
- Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Ballers ($400,000)
- Drew Barrymore, Santa Clarita Diet ($350,000)
- Emma Stone, Maniac ($350,000)
- Jonah Hill, Maniac ($350,000)
- Nancy Cartwright, The Simpsons ($315,000)
- Dan Castellaneta, The Simpsons ($315,000)
- Julie Kavner, The Simpsons ($315,000)
The top drama earners, though bagging a noticeably smaller amount of money, are divided into two very distinct groups: those who have been on Game of Thrones, and those who haven't:
- Lauren Graham, Gilmore Girls ($750,000)
- Alexis Bledel, Gilmore Girls ($750,000)
- Mark Harmon, NCIS ($525,000)
- Kevin Spacey, House of Cards ($500,000)
- Peter Dinklage, Game of Thrones ($500,000)
- Lena Headey, Game of Thrones ($500,000)
- Kit Harington, Game of Thrones ($500,000)
- Emilia Clarke, Game of Thrones ($500,000)
- Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Game of Thrones ($500,000)
- Claire Danes, Homeland ($450,000)
Don't even get me started about Variety's financial ranking of those in the reality/host/news category, including multiple Jimmys each bagging up to $15 million per year. Love crying and/or feeling hella inspired? Peep the full list right here.
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