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Last week, a national nightmare was prolonged. That's right, the freshman Fox sitcom Dads, one of the worst-reviewed TV shows in years, was given a full season. There are only three possible explanations for this: 1), executive producer Seth MacFarlane has too much clout, thanks to Family Guy and American Dad, for Fox to abandon ship on his latest property, 2) Fox has nothing good to replace it, new or reruns, or, 3) we're all doomed. It's probably a mixture of the three, particularly the third option. After all, we did just lose Breaking Bad.
Elsewhere on the fall TV front, a few of the regulars on our weekly Cancellation Watch received orders for new scripts—a sign that they'll hang around a bit longer, but not a guarantee that they're safe from the ax. There's also a new guest to the party here: NBC's revamped take on Dracula, which premiered last Friday night and stars Jonathan Rhys Meyers as the version of Count Dracula that Christopher Nolan would create if he, well, sucked.
Which new shows are in the clear, and which ones have showrunners who loathe Seth MacFarlane right about now? All will be answered in this week's edition of Cancellation Watch.
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Dracula (NBC)
Number Of Episodes: 1
Stars: Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Jessica De Gouw, Thomas Kretschmann, Oliver Jackson-Cohen, Katie McGrath, Victoria Smurfit, Nonso Anozie
Premise: Taking Bram Stoker's classic vampire novel into a new direction, Dracula follows the Count (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) living in America under the fake name Alexander Grayson and with a Bruce Wayne-like playboy stature. At night, when he's not schmoozing with Victorian London bigwigs, Dracula and his unlikely ally Abraham Van Helsing (Thomas Kretschmann) wage a war against the Order of the Dragon, a secret society that, centuries earlier, burned Dracula's lover—who looks an awful lot like London's own Mina Murray (Jessica De Gouw)—alive.
Worst moment from the latest episode: There are many things wrong with Dracula: Meyers' hammy performance as the Count, an overall sense of dullness, a muddled plot that's all action and little character development. In the show's pilot episode, it's also established that Dracula wants to be more like Stephen Sommers' awful Van Helsing (2004) than Tod Browning's Dracula (1931). Because of course NBC's Count Dracula is a martial arts expert, he gets into a highly stylized, nearly Matrix-like fight with an Order of the Dragons minion. Like everything else about Dracula, watching the Count turn into Jason Statham is scary for all the wrong reasons.
Prognosis: Remember, though,: People love Jason Statham. And, so far, they're also not mad at Jonathan Rhys Meyers in Dracula, which debuted last Friday to strong, if not mind-blowing, ratings. The show scored a 1.8 rating among adults 18-49, retaining 100% of the viewers for NBC's lead-in, the returning fan favorite Grimm. Even more worth bragging about: Dracula's premiere was the second-highest debut for a new 10 p.m drama this fall, behind NBC's breakout hit The Blacklist. Looks like there will be plenty more hand-to-hand combat in Meyers' future.
Back in the Game (ABC)
Number Of Episodes: 5
Stars: Maggie Lawson, James Caan, Griffin Gluck, Ben Koldyke, Lenors Crichlow, Cooper Roth, J.J. Totah, Kennedy Waite
Premise: Terry Gannon, a recently divorced woman (Maggie Lawson), and her son Danny (Griffin Gluck) leave Michigan and reluctantly move in with her father "The Cannon" (James Caan). She resents her father and blames him for her being damaged. (He took her to Mexico and left her with a team mascot while he was in jail when she was younger and later he failed to go to her college baseball games). After Danny fails to make his school baseball team Terry decides to become the coach for the league of misfits that didn't make the team despite wanting to forget baseball. Now Terry must wrestle living with her dad, being a mom and playing coach.
Worst moment from the latest episode: Another week, another one of the Cannon's unorthodox parenting lessons. This time he was trying to teach Danny a lesson by making him steal (this wouldn't make sense even if we gave you context). When a supermarket shopper spots the Cannon stuffing food down Danny's sweater, he threatens to beat him up with his fists, whom he calls Helen Hunt and Paul Reiser: "Now you better get out of here before we get 'Mad About You.'" It's hard to choose which was more of a clunker, the Cannon's line or this terrible '90s sitcom. We call foul.
Prognosis: Back in the Game is, for a lack of better words, still in the game. Its survived other fallen shows, but continues to show a lack of progress. This week's rating for the James Caan spearheaded show fell slightly from 1.8 to 1.7 in the adult demographic. The show's going to have to stop relying on the foul-mouthed Cannon if it's going to be a series contender.
Trophy Wife (ABC)
Number Of Episodes: 5
Stars: Malin Akerman, Bradley Whitford, Michaela Watkins, Ryan Lee, Natalie Morales, Bailee Madison, Marcia Gay Harden, Albert Tsai
Premise: Katie Harrison (Malin Akerman), an ex-party girl marries Pete, a lawyer, (Bradley Whitford) after a spontaenous meeting at a bar. Unsuspecting, she's also initiated into his chaotic family consisting of his two ex-wives, Diane (Marcia Gay Hatden) and Jackie (Michaela Watkins) and their children.
Worst moment from the latest episode: This evening's episode of Trophy Wife is brought to you exclusively by Microsoft's Surface Tablet, currently on sale at Best Buy, Wal-Mart, other major national retail outlets. Be sure to check out special promotional rates at specified online retailers, including Amazon. Among the stale, recycled jokes that were yawn-heavy in vanilla suburban fare back in the 8 Simple Rules days, during a segment where ex-wife number 2 makes an online video to get dates, she does so on a Microfost Surface Tablet. You get a face full of logo for nearly three solid minutes. The only way to describe the bold shamelessness of this episode's product placement is icky.
Prognosis: Despite earning the lowest ratings of its series run at 4.03 million viewers, Trophy Wife, thanks to a surge of positive reviews that is very confusing to this viewer, is hanging strong.
Super Fun Night (ABC)
Number Of Episodes: 4
Stars: Rebel Wilson, Lauren Ash, Liza Lapira, Kevin Bishop, Kate Jenkinson
Premise: Three nerdy friends, led by an inexplicably successful lawyer, Kimmie (Rebel Wilson), vow to live their lives to the fullest by going out every single weekend. The only problem is that they're all socially inept: Kimmie's got paralyzing shyness, Marika (Lauren Ash) is an unwittingly intimidating man-lady, and Helen-Alice (Liza Lapira) is a mousey Asian stereotype. Rounding out the cast are Kevin Bishop as Richard, Kimmie's immature but cute boss, and Kate Jenkinson as Kendall, Kimmie's ruthless, gold-digging co-worker.
Worst moment from the latest episode: Despite some highlights, including Helen, Alice, and Marika teaching themselves the word "ratchet" with flashcards and Ashley Tisdale playing Kimmie's sister (essentially a heightened version of Sharpay in High School Musical), Super Fun Night can't make up for the times you get the urge to fast-forward. As in, any time Richard and Kendall are on screen. Trying to make unlikable, boring people funny is more infuriating than endearing.
Prognosis: ABC announced that it order two more scripts of the sitcom, which essentially means it's clinging to life. Suggestion? Add Jackie Weaver to the main cast. As Kimmie's meddling mom, she's been the most genuinely entertaining aspect of the show's entire run.
Betrayal (ABC)
Number Of Episodes: 5
Stars: Hannah Ware, Stuart Townsend, Chris Johnson, Wendy Moniz, Henry Thomas, Braeden Lemasters, Elizabeth McLaughlin, James Cromwell
Premise: A beautiful but unhappily married photographerm Sara Hanley (Hannah Ware) begins an affair with a charming well-to-do stranger, Jack McAllister (Stuart Townswend), only to find out that said stranger is married and is the defending lawyer in a murder case on which her husband (Chris Johnson) is the prospecutor. Think of it as Romeo and Juliet for people who enjoyed Fifty Shades of Grey.
Worst moment from the latest episode: The most recent episode was all about playing fair, and what better way to even the playing field than by giving Jack Macaliister's cheated-on wife her own boy-toy, too? He comes in the form of a 29-year-old wine enthusiast who's got a thing for cougars. Why'd no one tell us that Days of Our Lives moved to a primetime slot?
Prognosis: Betrayal keeps trying to raise the stakes, with Jack's sociopathic son, Sarah and Jack's experimentation with role playing, and T.J.'s job at a body shop in the hood. But he show can't seem to introduce anything interesting enough to make you excited for the next episode.
Once Upon a Time in Wonderland
Number Of Episodes: 3
Stars: Sophie Lowe, Michael Socha, Peter Gadiot, Emma Rigby, Naveen Andrews, John Lithgow
Premise: Alice (Sophie Lowe) of Victorian England is convinced of an extradordinary world that exists within the depths of a rabbit hole of talking cards and pipe-smoking caterpillar. Believed to be insane, her doctors try to relieve of her such visions, but she is determined to find Cyrus (Peter Gadiot), whom she loved and lost to the evil plots of Red Queen (Emma Rigby) and Jafar (Naveen Andrews). With the help of the White Rabbit (John Lithgow) and Knave of Hearts (Michael Socha), Alice is on a quest to rescue Cyrus, among other adventures.
Worst moment from the latest episode: In a flashback, The Knave of Hearts, then known as Will Scarlet, convinces Robin Hood (Sean Maguire) and his Merry Men to rob Malfecient's castle of its substantial gold treasures. Upon returning and admiring their haul sitting round a camp fire, this interaction ensues. One of the robbers, smiling down at an open chest of glittering gold says that there isn't anything more beatiful than a treasure chest full of gold, to which, Will responds, "A chest of gold cannot compare to the beauty of a woman." To which the bearded man replies, "Depends on the chest." The whole crew erupts in laughter, thanks to a joke ripped from an '80s issue of National Lampoon's.
Prognosis: Once Upon a Time in Wonderland garnered 4.5 million viewers but that was down twenty-nine percent from its already underwhelming debut. Hopefully, the trend rates downward for this poorly written, Alice in Crappy Windows Screensaver CGI disappears down a rabbit hole, forever.
Sean Saves the World (NBC)
Number of episodes: 4
Stars: Sean Hayes, Linda Lavin, Samantha Isler, Thomas Lennon, Megan Hilty, Echo Kellum, Vik Sahay
Premise: Sean's (Sean Hayes) world is flipped around when he is dumped by the love of his life and his online retail company is bought up and his new boss Howard (Vik Sahay) is basically a manipulative robot. Oh, and his fourteen year old daughter, Ellie (Samantha Isler) has just moved in to his New York apartment after her mother abandoned her. How can Sean please his asshole boss by working late each night and get home to make chicken parm for a teenage daughter he knows almost nothing about?
Worst moment from the latest episode: There's a bit early in the episode that demonstrates the show has some clever, weird writers on staff—and then it ruins the moment by shoehorning in some lame and typical sitcom chatter. Sean's terrible boss calls a late-night meeting at the hotel room where he's been living. With his small staff gathered around him, he reveals the dead body of a bellboy in the bathroom, says he needs help disposing of the body and wants to hear ideas about how to do it. We're in weird, albeit cartoonish, territory, and for a minute you forget you're watching a network comedy. (Almost.) And then the scene ends with a bad joke from Sean about how he can't even get towels from the staff when he stays there. The laugh track goes wild. You want to die.
Prognosis: Sean isn't saving the world, he's stagnate. Ratings between the third and fourth episode had stayed the same (1.1; 4 million viewers). Star Sean Hayes blames NBC and it's rocky viewership for the show's status. Hear him tell it, and this show would be killing it on CBS. But it's not on CBS, and those ratings coupled with a beefing star means things are looking very bad.