Image via Complex Original
Unless you've been living under a rock, the defaced posters, entourages of screaming girls, and resurfacing of "Team Jacob" T-shirts have probably tipped you off that the Twilight series is about to make its big return to theaters. With Breaking Dawn's first installment slated for release on Friday, one thing is certain: This week is guaranteed to be an all-you-can-watch buffet of painstakingly awkward Kristen Stewart interviews.
"Wait, how awkward," you ask? So awkward that the film's leading actress has gained almost as much notoriety from her visibly uncomfortable press junkets as she has among Robert Pattinson stalkers. How will you know if you've witnessed such an interview? The typical K-Stew Q&A is generally characterized by hunching, eye rolls, stammering, and impulsive reaches for hair when reaching for an answer. (It's like the two are connected!)
Being the kind folks we are, we've decided to spare you the imminent Google searches. In honor of Breaking Dawn's November 18th release (God help us), we present to you the 7 Most Awkward Kristen Stewart Interviews.
Written by Lauren Otis (@LaurNado)
7. The Late Show With David Letterman
Ay, mami! You know you're in for a treat the second the actress awkwardly ambles in over the horn music. In what might be Bella Swan's most infamous interview to date, the Twilight star at her best seemed stiff; at her worst, strung out on quaaludes.
While Letterman's jokes might not have been all that funny to begin with, they either seem to go completely over Kristen's head or acknowledged with a blank stare and a "right...right," bringing the weirdness to entertaining new heights. Just when you think things can't get worse, the host probes the actress about her plans to drive from London to Russia. Ack.
6. Tribute.ca
While Twilight's leading actress thankfully gains composure about midway through, the first 30 seconds here pretty much speak for themselves. (Come to think of it, though, she never really stops looking like she wants to cut the cheery woman interviewing her.) We guess Kristen's sometimes-expressive face is both her blessing and her curse. Poor lady. She sounds so pumped just to be there.
5. MTV
Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson: Are they or aren't they? This was the question that followed the cozy-seeming co-stars just about everywhere they went before they were ultimately outed as a couple after an Oprah appearance. (Aren't you glad you asked?) However, anyone who checked out this interview with MTV from way back when could've made a pretty good educated guess.
When the interviewer asks the two about their pre-movie bonding, the film's leads get increasingly uncomfortable as the conversation turns to the long nights spent at Kristen's house. Awkward chuckles ensue as they begin to discuss their lack of "productivity" there. While the leading vamp tries to cover with an unconvincing, "Em...um...yeah. We did a lot of, uh, rehearsing," we have a hunch that if any took place at all, it was beneath the sheets.
4. The Today Show
While the staggering success of the Twilight series may have caused you to get a little more familiar with Robert Pattinson than you might've preferred, one thing you might not have known about the object of your girl's obsession is that Kristen Stewart played a part in his landing of the role. As she mentions on The Today Show, he was perfect because "the character is really small inside" and "he came to the audition looking terrified and like he shouldn't be there." Way to compliment your man, girl.
3. MTV's Rough Cut
MTV's Rough Cut interview certainly was rough to watch. To Kristen's credit, the discomfort-fest that was this video might not have completely been on her. The guy questioning her seemed to enjoy taking dig after dig that might've made anyone in the hot seat stutter (let alone Kristen Stewart), first implying that the actress had no idea what she was saying (truth), then more or less poking her about how she's gonna look like an amateur next to James Gandolfini in Welcome to the Rileys (also true, but c'mon, is that really necessary?). It's not hard to see why the poor girl could barely get a sentence out.
2. Jimmy Kimmel Live!
Are we the only ones who notice the back and forth, Paranormal Activity-style rocking around the 40, 55, and 74-second marks? (WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, KRISTEN?!?) The mild awkwardness becomes much more pronounced once Jimmy Kimmel insinuates that the actress likes to stalk herself online. After a corresponding jab at the host falls flat, she goes on to express that her new comedy, Adventureland is "kind of funny." Woof.
1. The Late Show With David Letterman (Again)
After Kristen's PR disaster of a Letterman interview went down in 2008, we all assumed there was nowhere to go but up. Right? Wrong! Well, things got off to promising enough of a start. Our girl had some color in her face, a little bounce in her step, she almost seemed—dare we say it?—enthusiastic.
But then David Letterman "unintentionally" called her a vampire about 38 seconds in and, judging from her face, you knew things were going to get ugly. To spare K-Stew any post-joke dead air, we're guessing the "laugh" cue cards were in full effect during her interview this go 'round because she seems to realize at a certain point that the audience is roaring at (literally) everything she says, making her notably discombobulated.
The crowning glory of this Q&A, however, is when the host pulls out pictures of her menacing-looking wolf-dog. Keep your eyes on Kristen after he makes the comment about Yellowstone. This moment is what we like to call, "the point of no return."