Image via Complex Original
This feature was originally published on March 3, 2014.
There are a number of television shows that, regardless of how we feel about them or how good they may have been, are simply "white." Now, before anyone gets offended and starts squawking about "reverse racism," allow us to explain what we mean.
We're not defining whiteness just in terms of skin color, but rather in terms of a naive or oblivious view of the world that's incapable of seeing the difference between the majority and the minority. Either that, or they just opt not to take it into consideration. To wrap it up in a neat little package, it's a world where the concept of the other simply doesn't exist.
Now, we're not suggesting that these shows were intentionally or maliciously created in this fashion, we're simply calling things as we see them. Despite our little disclaimer and explanation, we realize that some feathers will be ruffled, but we hope our recognition of the 25 Whitest TV Shows of All Time is understood and appreciated.
If not, feel free to spew your vitriol in the comments section.
Written by Julian Kimble (@JRK316).
25. 3rd Rock From the Sun
Network: NBC
Air Dates: January 9, 1996-May 22, 2001
Stars: John Lithgow, Kristen Johnson, French Stewart, Joseph Gordon-Levitt
The premise: In order to mask themselves as the average middle class white family, a group of aliens hides out in Ohio. Not a bad way to blend into white America at all. Each member of this masquerading family had a specific role, but Tommy (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) got the short end of the stick when he ended up with the body of a teenager. All four of the aliens are expected to report to their superior, the Big Giant Head, hilariously portrayed by Captain James T. Kirk himself, William Shatner.
Most of the show's early humor was derived from the aliens' struggles to blend into Middle America based on the bodies they'd been given. John Lithgow and Kristen Johnson towered over everyone, French Stewart squinted his way through the entire series and, in a nod to 10 Things I Hate About You (a wonderfully Caucasian teen classic), Joseph Gordon-Levitt's Tommy hooked up with Larisa Oleynik (aka Alex Mack,).
It's interesting that a team of aliens (or better yet, NBC) decided that pretending to be a strange white family was the best way to seem perfectly "human."
24. Coach
Network: ABC
Air Dates: February 28, 1989-May 14, 1997
Stars: Craig T. Nelson, Shelley Fabares, Jerry Van Dyke, Bill Fagerbakke, Clare Carey
For nine seasons, Craig T. Nelson starred as Hayden Fox, the coach of the Minnesota State University Screaming Eagles. His assistant coaches were friends Luther (Jerry Van Dyke) and the dim-witted Dauber (Bill Fagerbakke); his love interest was TV anchor Christine Armstrong (Shelley Fabares), who he eventually married. Aside from the stress of being a college football coach, Hayden struggled with the fact that his daughter, Kelly (Clare Carey), was growing up.
Hayden and Christine finally got out of Minnesota when he got an offer to join the staff of an NFL expansion team; of course, he brought Luther and Dauber with him. It was a great career move, and who'd really rather live in Minnesota than Florida?
Here's a better question though: How can you a show about college and later professional athletics be so white? It did originate in Minnesota, but come on.
23. The Torkelsons/Almost Home
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 21, 1991-June 6, 1993
Stars: Connie Ray, Olivia Burnette, Lee Norris, Anna Slotky, Aaron Michael Metchik, Rachel Duncan, William Schallert, Brittany Murphy, Jason Marsden, Perry King
If you were too young, too old, or possibly blinked, you might've missed The Torkelsons. The show took place in Oklahoma, where Millicent Torkelson found herself struggling to raise a stable of children alone after her husband bailed on the family.
After the first season, the show was refashioned as Almost Home, and it almost seemed like a good idea to have the family move to Seattle after Millicent got a new job. A Brady Bunch-like scenario almost came about when the Torkelsons moved in with Brian Morgan and his two kids, a decision that did not sit well with the children. Unfortunately, the new setting wasn't exactly a success, and The Torkelsons/Almost Famous ended after just two seasons on NBC. Still, the most memorable character is Chuckie Lee Torkelson, played by Lee Norris, would eventually become Minkus on Boy Meets World and "Mouth" McFadden on One Tree Hill.
Still wondering what's so white about both The Torkelsons and Almost Home? Both shows felt like one long Bonnie Raitt song.
22. Charles in Charge
Network: CBS
Air Dates: October 3, 1984-November 10, 1990
Stars: Scott Baio, Willie Aames, Sandra Kerns, Nicole Eggert, Josie Davis, Alexander Polinsky, Ellen Travolta, James T. Callahan
Not even references from Kid Cudi and Heavy D (R.I.P.) can save the Scott Baio-driven Charles in Charge. After his days as Chachi were over, Baio played college student Charles, who addressed his room-and-board issue by playing in-house babysitter to the Pembroke family. After the Pembrokes moved, the Powells moved into the house, again allowing Charles (the man) to remain in charge. This made for five years of wholesome television, including series' highlight Nicole Eggert, before she got tired of the "good girl" thing and blew Corey Haim (R.I.P.) away in Blown Away and then appeared on Baywatch.
Baio was a known "coos hound," as Neil Patrick Harris would say, and even dated Eggert. A lot of the show's super-white feel came from Baio himself, who to this day still looks like John Stockton after several tanning sessions. Short shorts and all.
21. Step By Step
Network: ABC/CBS
Air Dates: September 20, 1991- June 26, 1998
Stars: Patrick Duffy, Suzanne Somers, Staci Keanan, Christine Lakin, Brandon Call
Was Full House the white answer to Family Matters, or was it Step By Step? Or was Step By Step simply a rehash of Full House? Or was Step By Step meant to be a modern day Brady Bunch? Or, better yet, did ABC just make the same show many times over? Call it however you see it.
Frank and Carol, a divorced man and a widow, met while vacationing in Jamaica. Both had three kids each, and they eventually got married to a raise a big, blended family in a Wisconsin home. Joining them at one point was Frank's nephew Cody, a cross between Jeff Spicoli and a Bill & Ted-era Keanu Reeves.
It's damn near impossible to make a show set in a Milwaukee suburb that doesn't feel overwhelmingly white. We get it—the Bucks are the blackest thing about Milwaukee, but damn. You can combine two families but can't bring anything non-milquetoast?
20. Home Improvement
Network: ABC
Air Dates: September 17, 1991-May 25, 1999
Stars: Tim Allen, Patricia Richardson, Earl Hindman, Zachery Ty Bryan, Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Taran Noah Smith, Richard Karn
Tim Allen wasn't quite as wholesome as his Home Improvement character, Tim "The Toolman" Taylor—the real Tim served time in the late '70s and early '80s after getting caught with over a pound of coke. Home Improvement was the comedian's redemption song, of sorts.
Tim and his wife, Jill (Patricia Richardson), lived in the Detroit suburbs with their three sons, Brad (Zachery Ty Bryan), Randy (Jonathan Taylor Thomas) and Mark (Taran Noah Smith). As the requisite grunting white dad, Tim co-hosted the Binford Tools-sponsored show Tool Time with the frequent butt of all jokes, Al Borland (Richard Karn). Borland had the flannel game on lock way back in the day. Aside from the banter between Tim and Al, the highlight of Tool Time was the "Tool Time girl," first played by Pamela Anderson in her landmark television debut.
Because no show would be complete without a mysterious, all-knowing neighbor, the Taylors were enlightened by Wilson. Aside from Jill, Wilson was Tim's most trusted confidant, and gave him great advice through the show's duration. He was like some sort of friendly, white oracle. But his advice couldn't stop the deluge of gender role-reinforcing jokes.
19. Newhart
Network: CBS
Air Dates: October 2, 1982-May 21, 1990
Stars: Bob Newhart, Mary Framm, Peter Scolari, Jennifer Holmes, Julia Duffy, Tom Poston, Steven Kampmann, William Sanderson, Tony Papenfuss
It's hard to pick on Bob Newhart, but nobody's safe here. For eight seasons, Newhart and Mary Frann played Dick and Joanna Loudon, the author and his devoted spouse who ran an inn in a small Vermont town. It doesn't get much whiter than that.
The Beaver Lodge was visited by several weirdos, whose strange behavior often left Dick questioning his own sanity. Though he eventually began hosting his own local talk show, he was still plagued by the locals and their odd ways.
Newhart was as lovable as Bob Newhart himself, but it couldn't have been further removed from the alternate white univ—er, Vermont town that the characters inhabited.
18. Everybody Loves Raymond
Network: CBS
Air Dates: September 13, 1996-May 16, 2005
Stars: Ray Romano, Brad Garrett, Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle
Even in syndication, Everybody Loves Raymond remains one of the most popular shows on television. Drawing on his own experiences, comedian Ray Romano played a sportswriter living with his wife and kids in New York. His meddling parents lived right across the street, and his giant curmudgeon of an older brother was forever jealous that his parents paid more attention to Ray than him. That sibling rivalry thing really lasts deep into adulthood, doesn't it?
Ray always found himself in the middle of taxing situations, but never had the resolve to do anything because he's too afraid of his overbearing mother. Truth be told, Ray Romano did the whole "laugh at my pain" thing before Kevin Hart—it just had the feel of a Norman Rockwell painting.
Maybe so many people loved Raymond because he was that henpecked white guy that everyone knows and tries to avoid.
17. Mad About You
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 23, 1992-May 24, 1999
Stars: Paul Reiser, Helen Hunt
Mad About You defined "dry, white sitcom." Just hearing the name "Paul Reiser" makes your hands ashy. Reiser and Helen Hunt (who was just nominated for an Oscar this year) played a New York couple whose random meeting blossomed into an uninteresting relationship. Even though it was quite popular during its seven-season run on NBC, Mad About You always felt like a very poor man's Seinfeld, and nowhere near as engaging.
Where Seinfeld was hilarious, Mad About You was its blander, irritating cousin. As for Reiser and Hunt, they played your standard white television couple (money not an issue, nice apartment, mildly boring friends), only with less personality than normal. Honestly, they could've been played by two blank pieces of printer paper and been more colorful.
Still, Mad About You did a very good job of making viewers forget about what a prick Reiser was in Aliens.
16. Freaks and Geeks
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 25, 1999-July 8, 2000
Stars: Linda Cardellini, John Francis Daley, James Franco, Seth Rogen, Jason Segel, Martin Starr, Samm Levine, Busy Phillips, Joe Flaherty, Beck Ann Baker
Don't get us wrong, we love this show. Freaks and Geeks was ahead of its time, a sign of the talky Apatow comedies that bring on smiles and real feelings. It was a show about teenagers dealing with the other side of the game: being a misfit in suburbia. Just to make things more interesting, the show was set in 1980, allowing a generation of adults to relive their awkward teen years. Especially if we're talking about white folks.
The setting was the fictional Detroit suburb of Chippewa, where Lindsay Weir and her little brother Sam lived with their parents. Lindsay, a smart and good natured girl, was going through that phase that many teens go through: Trying to find a group of friends consistent with their personal evolution. She started hanging out with a group of slackers, alienating her former friends, confusing her parents and ultimately herself.
Sam had a completely different struggle, as he and his nerdy band of friends tried to cope with being at the bottom rung of high school's hierarchy.
Despite all of its greatness and the brilliance of Judd Apatow, Freaks and Geeks is still a pretty undeniably "white" television show—the suburbs are a bubble in fundamental ways.
Think of a brilliant debut album that was over most consumers' heads at the time, like Reasonable Doubt for example. Freaks and Geeks is its equivalent, as it's the Holy Bible for being an out of place white teenager during the early '80s. Apatow could probably tell you that himself, Reasonable Doubt reference and all.
15. Growing Pains
Network: ABC
Air Dates: September 24, 1985-April 25, 1992
Stars: Alan Thicke, Kirk Cameron, Joanna Kerns, Tracey Gold, Jeremy Miller, Leonardo DiCaprio
No, Growing Pains wasn't about the feeling you get every single time Kirk Cameron goes on one of his homophobic rants, but that might be a spot-on title for a future documentary. Growing Pains was about the Seaver family of a Long Island. When Maggie Seaver lands a job as a TV reporter, Dr. Jason Seaver decides to practice from home and look after the kids, Mike, Carol, and Ben. They ended up having a fourth child named Chrissy, and acquired an unofficial fifth when they took in Luke Brower ( Leonardo DiCaprio, before the fame) during the show's final season.
Since the show's ending, Alan Thicke has been stamped as one of the coolest motherfucker's of all-time, DiCaprio became the new De Niro and Kirk Cameron has (unfortunately) enjoyed his descent from born-again Christian to a pain in the ass with diarrhea of the mouth. Cameron's transformation into a borderline religious zealot during the show's run actually hurt Growing Pains, as he left his pompous, white Christian male imprint on the show. Victoria Jackson probably loved this shit back in the day.
14. 7th Heaven
Network: The WB/CW
Air Dates: August 26, 1996-May 13, 2007
Stars: Stephen Collins, Catherine Hicks, Barry Watson, Jessica Biel, David Gallagher, Beverley Mitchell
Was there a more disgustingly wholesome family on television than the Camdens? They were fine people, but it doesn't get much more pious than a Protestant minister with seven kids, each named after key biblical figures. As their children grew up and left the nest, Reverend Camden and his wife provided housing to numerous people during the show's run (which felt like an eternity); still, that household was a WASP's nest. Each episode was like a chapter of the bible in that there was a lesson to be learned, meaning the show played out like an instructional video for goody two-shoes kids across the nation. People got fed up with it, and by people, we mean Jessica Biel.
Biel got so tired of the whole Mary Camden charade that she posed in Gear magazine in various stages of undress, something producers didn't take a liking to. Realizing Biel was over the Virgin Mary role, they turned her into a rebel and eventually wrote her out of the show. She appeared periodically until 7th Heaven finally ended. Since she's enjoyed a successful film career and became Mrs. Justin Timberlake last year. She won.
7th Heaven ran for 11 seasons, making it The WB's longest running series ever, as well as television's longest-running family drama. It will take the cast—with the exception of Biel—years to cleanse themselves of their roles after being baptized as the whitewashed Camdens.
13. Cheers
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 30, 1982-May 20, 1993
Stars: Ted Danson, Rhea Perlman, Shelley Long, Kirstie Alley, George Wendt, John Ratzenberger, Woody Harrelson, Kelsey Grammer
For 11 seasons, Sam Malone and his gang of regular customers shared their ups and downs over drinks at Cheers, a bar that was more like a home; probably a living room, to be specific. It's that type of environment, and the patrons behaving like family, that kept Cliff—the '80s mailman par excellence, save for Karl Malone-from going postal. That, and probably the beer.
Cheers gave us a look at the various characteristics and relationship dynamics between every type of bar employee and patron. Sam was the typical smooth male bartender who got a lot of ass by laying that Robert Redford "White Guy Game" down, but never had a meaningful relationship, while Woody was the lovable yet dim-witted guy you had no issues spilling your problems to. During her time in Boston, Diane was that waitress who thought she was too smart for the job, though she really (obviously) wasn't. Carla was that crass, bitter waitress that made fun of everyone and Dr. Frasier Crane was the dictionary definition of the upper class white male.
Cheers is one of the best sitcoms of all-time, but let's keep it one hundred: What could possibly be whiter than a show about a bar in Boston?
12. Full House
Network: ABC
Air Dates: September 22, 1987-May 23, 1995
Stars: Bob Saget, Dave Coulier, John Stamos, Candace Cameron, Jodie Sweetin, Mary-Kate Olsen, Ashley Olsen, Lori Loughlin, Andrea Barber
Before Bob Saget's famous "suck dick for coke" line from Half Baked and before he famously cock-blocked Johnny Drama on Entourage, he played Danny Tanner on ABC's Full House. Representing every tall, non-threatening, shirt-tucked-in white father, Tanner had a challenging TV task: raising three girls alone. And by alone, we mean with the help of his friend Joey (or Uncle Joey, played by Dave Coulier) and brother-in-law, Jesse (Uncle Jesse, played famously by John Stamos). All of them lived together with Tanner and his three daughters—D.J., Stephanie, and Michelle—and juggled their careers while helping the girls reach adulthood.
Uncle Jesse was the struggling artist with the cool hair, Uncle Joey was the comedian, and Danny hosted a radio show called "Wake Up, San Francisco" with Rebecca Donaldson (Lori Loughlin), who would eventually become Aunt Becky (need we make a "Becky" joke here?) when Uncle Jesse hit her with that Katsopolis game.
Even though there was the occasional minority character, and Steve Urkel did appear in a TGIF crossover episode, Full House was pretty much the Caucasian answer to Family Matters, save for a few minor details. Kimmy Gibbler played the role of Urkel on Full House, and few things scream "white-ass television show" louder than the name Kimmy Gibbler.
Like Family Matters, Full House started to get old, an easy thing when the edgiest thing on the show is an Elvis fanatic with smooth hair. Still, Uncle Jesse's handshake (or non-handshake, rather) is only rivaled in coolness by the "Harbaugh Handshake," and Dave Coulier will live on as the alleged inspiration for every angry white girl's answer to the entire Waiting to Exhale Soundtrack: Alanis Morissette's "You Oughta Know."
11. Girls
Network: HBO
Air Dates: April 15, 2012-Present
Stars: Lena Dunham, Allison Williams, Jemima Kirke, Zosia Mamet
We hate to say it, but it's almost impossible to talk about white women in popular culture in the year 2013 without mentioning either Sex and the City or Girls. Girls, aka The House that Lena Dunham built, is like Sex and the City's confused, twentysomething younger niece. The characters either think they have it all figured out, or they're on the verge of a meltdown when they come to the realization that they don't. We recognize this because we see it play out every week that way in real life, too.
Instead of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda, Girls gets up close and personal with Hannah, Marnie, Jessa, and Shoshanna as they live their 20s in New York, one mistake at a time. Hannah is the neurotic aspiring writer whose stream-of-thought tangents are "sweet, naive, and infuriating." Marnie is the "pretty girl" who's slowly figuring out that her looks are not the third dimension of her personality. Jessa, the wildcard of the group, judges everyone with her condescending accent. Shoshanna is the baby; all of her limited life experiences are shaped by popular culture.
The show has been criticized for its lack of diversity, so to toss a middle finger to the haters, viewers saw Donald Glover in a manner that they least expected in the second season premiere. Still, while it's a relatable program, there's something distinctly white about it. Maybe it's how oblivious the main characters are; they're clueless about what's happening around them.
Maybe it's the notion that fucking a black guy or your knowledge of the mixtape hustle makes you "cultured." That's alright though, because regardless of race, we all know (or at least should know) that someday our lives will make sense. And until then, things will be messy.
10. The Brady Bunch
Network: ABC
Air Dates: September 26, 1969-March 8, 1974
Stars: Robert Reed, Florence Henderson, Ann B. Davis, Barry Williams, Maureen McCormick, Christopher Knight, Eve Plumb, Mike Lookinland, Susan Olsen
Regardless of what decade you were born in, you know this story. It's the story of a huge family composed of two families. A widower with three sons meets a woman with three daughters, they get married, and everybody winds up living happily in the house that he built? Yeah, right. With all of those kids and all of that teen angst in that house, there was bound to be far more drama than what we really saw from The Brady Bunch.
One of the biggest sources of "drama," was middle daughter Jan's feelings of inferiority to her older sister, Marcia. Her "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" outburst might be one of television's earliest documented cases of #whitegirlproblems. Still, the show was interesting at the time for viewing issues through the eyes of the children (especially since they outnumbered adults), its opening title sequence, and for that damn Davy Jones episode.
The Brady Bunch was meant to represent the ideal, big, happy white family. Despite its iconic status, it never came across as convincing in its attempts to pull that off. What does that say about the so-called ideal?
9. Sex and the City
Network: HBO
Air Dates: June 6, 1998-February 22, 2004
Stars: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon
For six seasons and two feature films, Sex and the City had the complete attention of the women who saw a little bit of themselves in Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda. The show chronicled the often hilarious moments in the lives of four upwardly mobile women living in New York City. #whitegirlproblems evolve into #whitewomanproblems, which is what Sex and the City was all about. Though fictional, it was treated like a holy scripture, the type of thing that inspired viewing parties, drinking games, and endless brunch conversations.
It remains the affluent thirtysomething white woman's Illmatic, but you'd be hard-pressed to find one woman without at least some knowledge of Sex and the City. It's the show that was forced on an entire gender.
8. The Andy Griffith Show
Network: CBS
Air Dates: October 3, 1960-April 1, 1968
Stars: Andy Grifffith, Don Knotts, Ron Howard, Frances Bavier
Andy Griffith played Andy Taylor, the sheriff of Mayberry, North Carolina. The widowed Taylor balanced raising his son, Opie (a young Ron Howard), along with cleaning up the messes of his bumbling, elastic-faced deputy, Barney Fife (Don Knotts). Stanley Kubrick and Full Metal Jacket can also thank The Andy Griffith Show for creating the character of Gomer Pyle. Thanks to the general sleepiness of Mayberry, Griffith himself even admitted that the show felt more like the '30s than the '60s. What he really meant was, it's a parallel white dimension: A show set in the south in the '60s that didn't engage with the Civil Rights Movement.
The Andy Griffith Show operated in the same lane as Leave It to Beaver, in that it offered a nice, simple slice of what it meant to be white in America at the time.
7. Gilmore Girls
Network: The WB/CW
Air Dates: October 5, 2000-May 15, 2007
Stars: Lauren Graham, Alexis Bledel
If the struggles of dealing with the move from public to private school and eventually an Ivy League university, as well that nuisance of affluent parents who try to micromanage your life well into adulthood, is something you relate to, than Gilmore Girls was right up your alley.
Set in Connecticut (obviously), the show's central characters were Lorelai Gilmore (Lauren Graham) and her daughter Rory (Alexis Bledel). Lorelai did pretty well for herself considering that she conquered the whole "teen mom" cliché, and Rory was every bit as intelligent as the other students at Chilton prep. Still, Lorelai had a strained relationship with her estranged parents that she eventually had to mend to help fund Rory's education. Rory was challenged by academic rivals and dealt with the stressful decisions facing most high schoolers, like which guy is the right guy for me.
Despite some acclaim and a successful run on The WB, the show only survived one season after the network transformed into The CW. We enjoyed Graham more as a bizarre woman with a Santa fetish in Bad Santa and Bledel playing a more confused variation of Rory Gilmore in Post Grad, another millennial tale of #whitegirlproblems.
6. Dawson's Creek
Network: The WB
Air Dates: January 20, 1998-May 14,2003
Stars: James Van Der Beek, Katie Holmes, Joshua Jackson, Michelle Williams
It all started with the theme song.
From the moment you hear Paula Cole's "I Don't Want to Wait," you know you're about to be enthralled in some bleached teenage drama. Set in Massachusetts, Dawson's Creek followed the young lives of Dawson (James Van Der Beek), Pacey (Joshua Jackson), Joey (Katie Holmes), and Jen (Michelle Williams) through high school and eventually to college. It dealt with all of the angst of being a teenager in a small town, where Dawson & Co. were faced with challenging issues like who to date and why. Pretty White Kids With Problems would've been a much more fitting title.
Dawson's Creek was adored by middle schoolers, high schoolers, college students, ashamed adults, and critics for its portrayal of those difficult formative years. The show also proved to be a revolving door for young, white Hollywood, as several actors either blew up or made a random appearance on the show. Though it created several memorable TV moments, from the late-'90s and early aughts, none have aged quite as well as this, or the subsequent GIFs. When a young, white male cries, the world stops.
Van Der Beek would go on to totally erase the image of Dawson when he played Patrick Bateman's younger brother, Sean, in The Rules of Attraction.
5. Family Ties
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 22, 1982-May 14, 1989
Stars: Michael J. Fox, Justine Bateman, Meredith Baxter-Birney, Michael Gross
Michael J. Fox didn't always get to play the cool guy. Before he earned his stripes as Marty McFly in the Back to the Future franchise, he played Alex P. Keaton, the young Republican son of two former tree-huggers on NBC's Family Ties. Set in suburban Ohio during the Reagan era, the show followed the Keaton family. Yes, it's common to see offspring that are nothing like their parents, and Family Ties showed how kids often reject their parents values. However, they flipped it: Alex was dressing like a Capitol Hill staffer as a kid and his sister Mallory was the typical vapid teenage girl, the polar opposite of her feminist mother.
The show was really a sign of the times; it reflected how a whole generation of kids had moved away from the radicalism of the 1960s and 1970s in favor of conservatism. It's cute how the showrunners put a pretty little bow on the Reaganomics that fucked up the country during the 1980s, too. If you're crafting a documentary about what it meant to be white in America during the '80s, it wouldn't be complete without a segment on Family Ties.
4. Frasier
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 16, 1993-May 13, 2004
Stars: Kelsey Grammer, David Hyde Pierce, John Mahoney, Jane Leeves, Peri Gilpin
Remember when we asked what could be whiter than a bar in Boston? How about a Frasier Crane-driven show.
Network television loved the character of Dr. Frasier Crane so much that they milked about 20 years of television out of him. After first appearing on Cheers as one of Diane's love interests, Frasier became a regular at the bar, and eventually moved back to Seattle after his relationship with Lilith deteriorated. For another eleven seasons on NBC, Kelsey Grammer started as the good Doc, who went back to his hometown to enjoy the single life. Unexpectedly, he found himself forced to care for his father, a retired cop, and engaging in wonderfully dry talk with his brother Niles, a fellow psychiatrist. One of the show's running gags was that Niles is who Frasier would've been if he never went to Boston and encountered the cast of Cheers. Insert jokes about opera here.
Aside from being arguably the most successful spinoff ever created, Frasier allowed Kelsey Grammer to transform from a supporting character into a leading man, and it provided David Hyde Pierce with his breakout role. At its peak, Frasier was one of the best shows on television, and one of the last truly "adult" sitcoms, filled with witty white humor that left many of us confused. Frasier and Niles were the kings of those awkward, Dennis Miller jokes that nobody laughed at. It's like they were speaking in some secret language.
One amazing fact: While Frasier is one of the most vanilla television shows ever scripted, Grammer was a behind-the-scenes force for shows like Girlfriends and The Game, earning him the adoration of countless black women over the past decade or so.
Frasier fucking Crane. Who knew?
3. Leave It to Beaver
Network: CBS/ABC
Air Dates: October 4, 1957-June 20, 1963
Stars: Jerry Mathers, Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow
Created in the middle of the 20th century, Leave It to Beaver followed the Cleaver family, meant to represent the ideal middle class, suburban family of the era. Basically, if Wonder Bread had a show, it would've been Leave It to Beaver.
The show focused on Theodore "The Beaver" Cleaver, presenting the world through his young eyes. He lived with his parents, June and Ward Cleaver, and had an older brother named Wally. All of this sounds very non-threatening and conventional. Because it was. Nearly all of the shows characters were middle-class whites, and Wally and The Beav had the average, white picket fence upbringing with two parents who rarely argued or had any type of marital issues. In fact, Leopold "Butters" Stotch and his tragic innocence that's become one of South Park's strongest points is based on the world that Beaver Cleaver grew up in.
2. Friends
Network: NBC
Air Dates: September 22, 1994-May 6, 2004
Stars: Jennifer Aniston, Courtney Cox, Matthey Perry, Matt LeBlanc, David Schwimmer, Lisa Kudrow
During the '90s, "Must See TV" really meant "most of white America watches it." NBC had no idea what they were working with when Friends premiered in the fall of 1994, as the show enjoyed ten seasons of dominance in that storied Thursday night position. Friends was about a group of friends living in Manhattan, which seems like the skeleton for every '90s sitcom. That's because Friends was arguably the '90s sitcom, so perfectly manufactured that there was almost no way it could fail. Despite being given all of the tools to succeed (like Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox in the '90s), nothing can be taken away from Friends. Many sitcoms deal with families, and the gang from Friends represented a family of sorts. Sometimes, you need a support system outside of your blood relations, and that's what Friends was all about. It was more than an attempt to tap into the Generation X audience, because it had something for everyone. Well, almost everyone.
Even with all of its accolades and position as one of the better sitcoms to be green-lit, it was so damn white. Giving Aisha Tyler a recurring role couldn't even save Friends from its whiteness, which was amplified by its the theme song, courtesy of The Rembrandts. Thanks to the show, the song (which we refuse to name because you know it, dammit) has become a jock bar staple. Regardless, with moneymakers like 30 Rock and The Office coming to an end, NBC wishes they had something like Friends to air on Thursday nights now. Because more white faces are exactly what prime-time television needs.
1. Seinfeld
Network: NBC
Air Dates: July 5, 1989-May 14, 1998
Stars: Jerry Seinfeld, Jason Alexander, Michael Richards, Julia Louis-Dreyfus
It was a show about nothing—nothing but white people. Though it's easily one of the best sitcoms ever, Seinfeld is also the whitest show ever. Created by Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David, the show focused on the random occurrences in Seinfeld's life. The bulk of his interactions were with his friend George, his one-time girlfriend Elaine, and Kramer, the weird guy with the crazy hair that lived across the hall from him. Seinfeld was a rare bird; it didn't focus on co-workers or a family, but was totally driven by characters. It's impossible to imagine a show that could succeed without its characters evolving or changing, but Seinfeld charmed its way to the top of the Nielsen ratings and into the hearts of critics without the main characters ever learning anything. They stayed locked inside their world (a metaphor for whiteness?). Their mistakes were hilarious and made for amazing television—watching strange white folks do anything is amazingly rewarding.
Seinfeld became a pop culture phenomenon, all the way down to its music. The show inspired Wale to create the critically acclaimed Mixtape About Nothing, thrusting him into the spotlight. He followed it up with More About Nothing in 2010, and earlier this year, Seinfeld himself revealed that he and Wale would be collaborating on The Album About Nothing.
Prior to Wale, the last time you heard black folks mentioned in the same breath as Seinfeld was after Michael Richards' 2006 N-bombing. Even though Richards made fun of himself and the incident on David's Curb Your Enthusiasm, people still haven't forgotten. That didn't tarnish the reputation of Seinfeld, which, for all of its Caucasian nihilism, is one of the most important shows ever made.