The Dumbest Things Ryan Lochte Said on Last Night's "What Would Ryan Lochte Do?"

More Lochte-isms to fry your brain.

Complex Original

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With last week’s premiere of What Would Ryan Lochte Do?, the 11-time medalist captivated viewers with his shenanigans and a TV-friendly catchphrase (“Jeah!”). As if the realms of reality television and the Olympics weren’t enough, this week saw the Olympic swimmer take over Washington, D.C., where he was in town to receive an award and deliver a speech.

But as one would expect of Lochte in the U.S. Capitol, he proved himself again as the president of sound bites. In case you missed them, we present The 10 Dumbest Things Ryan Lochte Said on Last Night’s What Would Ryan Lochte Do?

On blanking out: “I don’t even know. Something will pop up in my head. It can be the weirdest thing, like all of a sudden, like I have like a jumping banana in my head and I just stop and pause. I’m like, ‘That damn jumping banana’s in my head.’ Like, I don’t even know what’s going on up there.”

On his speech: “So I didn’t write out my speech. I had wrote down bullet points of certain topics and then under each topic I had a little…little…what do you call it? Um…bulletin and then, like a fact. Yeah.”

On his trip to Washington, D.C.: “Lochte for President! Jeah!”

On his preferred President, Abraham Lincoln: “Mom, you know why he’s my favorite president? ‘Cause what president can rock a top hat? He seriously, he got some mad swag.”

On the pool in front of the Washington Monument: “I guarantee I can be the first one peeing in that reflecting pool.”

On his catchphrase: “It’s spelled J-E-A-H. If you say it how it’s spelled, it’s “jeah,” but that’s boring. No one wants to hear that, so you really have to put that enfidence on that “j,” and then the “A-H,” kind of just flows.

On his haircut: “The key to the Lochte haircut is being fresh and looking up-to-date.”

On the recently resigned Pope Benedict XVI: “I guess you can call him like, Ex-Benedict.”

On his look: “Now that I have this clean-cut look, I want a girl to be like, ‘Damn! What? You see that guy? Damn, he’s a good-looking guy.’ I’m like, ‘Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!’”