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When directors like George Méliès and D.W. Griffith were pioneering filmmaking at the beginning of the 20th century, neither had any intention of grossing out audiences with the use of bodily fluids on the big screen. But as cinema has evolved from a technical standpoint over the years, some of its subject matter has reverted back to the grade-school humor that we all grew up with. For better or worse, this kind of stuff sells, and the movie industry has been rolling in billions ever since.
In recent decades we’ve seen more urine, vomit, and diarrhea on the screen than ever before. For some, this is absolutely nauseating, but for others it speaks to the 10-year-old in all of us that just can’t get enough of it. And in this Friday's new movie, The Paperboy, there is a scene that has already gained notoriety around the web for featuring the usually-reserved Nicole Kidman squatting down over teen idol Zac Efron and unleashing a hefty stream of urine on his face and chest after he is stung by a jellyfish.
This kind of grotesque act is nothing new, and to get you in the spirit for this latest example of crass humor, Complex looks back at The Most Disgusting Uses of Bodily Fluids in Movies.
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Written by Jason Serafino (@serafinoj1)
10. Lloyd's bladder release beer, Dumb and Dumber (1994)
The Farrelly Brothers and Jim Carrey have made a comfortable living off of gross-out humor, and this scene from Dumb and Dumber might be the team’s best yet.
After Harry and Lloyd hop into their dog van to elude Seabass and his vicious crew, Lloyd suddenly has the urge to pee. Unable to stop driving, he’s forced to relieve himself into some empty beer bottles. When a quick-tempered cop subsequently pulls them over, the officer demands that they hand over what he thinks is an open bottle of alcohol. Unfortunately for him, he's a little too diligent at his job and decides he needs a sip of the “booze” just to make sure. Needless to say, hilarity ensues.
9. Bobby's voluminous ejaculate, Scary Movie (2000)
The first Scary Movie will always be the series’ best, and it’s because of scenes like this one that it has become so memorable. When Bobby (Jon Abrahams) and Cindy (Anna Faris) go into his bedroom for a little late-night coitus, things go real bad, real fast. As Bobby prepares to blow his proverbial load, he erupts with an explosion of sticky DNA that makes Mount Vesuvius look like a grammar school water fountain.
The result leaves Cindy plastered to the ceiling and Bobby emptied out almost into a skeletal husk. If it’s any consolation, though, it certainly seemed like they had a good time while it lasted. In Scary Movie 2, Faris is involved in a similar scene in a freezer that gave a new meaning to the word “creamsicle.” The poor girl just can’t catch a break.
8. Preston Lacy's sweatsuit cocktail, Jackass 3D (2010)
The Jackass films haven’t reinvented the wheel, as far as gross-out humor is concerned, but the series’ penchant for using real bodily fluids, as opposed to Hollywood magic, separates it from the rest. Case in point: this infamous sweatsuit cocktail scene, which is one of the series' most disgusting segments.
During the scene, the gang slapped a plastic running suit on Preston Lacy’s ample figure and forced him onto an elliptical machine. After working out for a few minutes, the suit began to fill with sweat, which was then emptied out into a cup for Steve-O to drink. It’s nearly impossible to watch him drink that hot, cloudy liquid without feeling your lunch slowly creeping back up your throat.
7. Period Blood Girl's pants stain, Superbad (2007)
Superbad is one of the funniest Hollywood comedies of the past decade, but there is one scene that stops the whole thing dead in its tracks in revolting fashion. After Seth gets done dancing with a mystery girl at a party, he notices a red stain on his pants. It turns out that the girl was getting visited by her Aunt Flow pretty hard and heavy at the time and left an indelible mark on the impressionable youth.
This, of course, leads to Seth almost getting pounded into the pavement by the girl’s boyfriend, who also shares the same scarlet blotch on his pants. This is why you should only dance with girls who are wearing fisherman waders.
6. Lard Ass' vomitous revenge, Stand By Me (1986)
The infamous vomit scene from Stand By Me lands on this list because it’s gross and also a feat of choreography. The nastiness occurs at a pie-eating contest where a fat kid, mockingly called “Lard Ass,” gets revenge on the people who have picked on him throughout his life. After drinking a bottle of castor oil, eating a raw egg, and finishing off five whole pies, he unleashes a deluge of blueberry vomit on his fellow competitors.
After witnessing this, the other contestants begin projectile vomiting all over themselves and each other. We assume this is what 'Nam was like, but instead of the guts of teenage Marines, people were being covered by half-digested baked goods. This is about as close to choreographed, synchronized hurling as you’re going to get.
5. Stifler's spunk-spiked beer, American Pie (1999)
The American Pie franchise has had its fair share of gross-out moments, but its very first outing included the series’ most vile offense. After Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas) busts a load into a cup of beer during a kegger, Stifler (Seann William Scott) unknowingly chugs the mug of frosty man spunk, much to the delight—and disgust—of audiences. It was nice to see the prickish Stifler get his comeuppance, but we’ll never be truly comfortable letting our pints of beer out of our sight ever again.
As if Stifler’s ingestion of the nasty cream ale wasn’t bad enough, he then also vomited it up in front of the girl he was trying to sleep with. If you’re a big fan of bodily fluids, this scene has it all.
4. Mary's extra sticky hair gel, There’s Something About Mary (1998)
It’s not often that an entire movie succeeds due to one scene, but the infamous sperm hair gel gag in There’s Something About Mary is easily the most remembered moment from the flick. After mistaking this protein-packed glob of paternity paste on Ted Stroehmann’s (Ben Stiller) ear for hair product, Mary Jensen (Cameron Diaz) quickly runs it through her blonde locks to look stylish for dinner.
Unbeknownst to her, she’s left with what people have affectionately termed a “cumlick,” causing her bangs to stand straight up. It’s a disgusting piece of cinema that also happens to be a great sight gag from the Farrelly Brothers, who used to be the masters of such humor. This scene also taught us never to trust any globule hanging off a man’s body.
3. Renton's toilet dive, Trainspotting (1996)
It’s never a good thing to have your heroin-induced constipation wear off right when you plant an opium suppository inside of yourself, but that’s exactly what makes this iconic scene from Trainspotting so sickeningly brilliant. When Renton (Ewan McGregor) does his business on “The Worst Toilet in Scotland” he realizes that his precious suppositories might be lost forever. But instead of coming to terms with it, he sticks his arms in the muddy toilet water and begins to fish around for them.
That’s not even the worst part. As he digs through the fecal stew, he goes further and further into the toilet until he eventually slides through the pipes into a beautiful, watery oasis and finds his beloved opium. We know drugs can do strange things to a person, but we didn’t know that gleefully swimming through your own diarrhea was one of them. A straight-edge life it is for us!
2. Brundlefly's foot-dissolving spew, The Fly (1986)
There aren’t many frames from David Cronenberg’s remake of The Fly that won’t twist your stomach into knots like a pretzel, but one of the film’s most memorable moments comes when Seth Brundle (Jeff Goldblum) vomits up a corrosive enzyme that dissolves Stathis Borans’ right foot. As if watching the flesh bubble and pull apart like string cheese isn’t foul enough, listening to the gurgling of Brundle’s deadly stomach acids puts this scene over the top.
The bit isn’t without its scientific merit, as Brundle’s acidic vomit is similar to what actual flies do to their food before they eat in an attempt to break it down for easier ingestion. Grounding in reality won't make you any less queasy, though.
1. Regan's demonic vomit, The Exorcist (1973)
The Exorcist is the preeminent horror movie in American film history and also a trailblazer in its use of bodily functions to turn the collective stomachs of audiences everywhere. During one of the film’s most infamous scenes, Regan (Linda Blair) spews some righteous neon-green vomit all over the face of Father Karras (Jason Miller). This act introduced people to the wonders of bodily fluids on the big screen.
It’s hard enough to get human puke out of your clothing, so we can’t wrap our head around how much Tide the padre had to use to get out demonic vomit. This is a film filled with violent imagery and sacrilegious scenes of masturbation, but we still keep returning to Regan firing off this green sludge as the most disgusting moment of the whole movie.