Image via Complex Original
Women may never truly understand men and men won't ever wrap their heads around what women really want, but that's okay. We can all appreciate a little mystery. And while you don't need to know everything about the other sex, you should probably be aware of what pisses them off.
Because we aren't all wired the same way, there are things that seem inoffensive to you that many women will find crude. If you knew better, you do better, so here are 15 Unintentionally Annoying Things Guys Do to Women.
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Grab her around the waist in the club
Just as a crowded subway car is no excuse for inappropriate touching, a crowded club or party isn't either. If you need to get past a woman in a crowded space, say "excuse me" or politely tap her on the shoulder to get her attention if she can't hear you. Grabbing her by the waist and holding her in place as you make a way for you to pass is disrespectful of her body and boundaries. Despite the close quarters in the club, everyone still has the right to personal space, and placing your hands on a woman's waist is annoying and grossly inappropriate.
Send one word texts
She just typed out the equivalent to a doctoral thesis and after reading it, the best reply you could muster up was, "K"? You couldn't attempt to reciprocate her effort with a more thought out text? For some women, that one word text will suffice, but for most, a complete subject plus predicate sentence is the appropriate response. You don't even have to type the sentence out. Just use the talk-to-text function on your phone. She gets a multi-word response and you don't get another dissertation on why your short response annoyed her. It's a win-win scenario.
Stalk her online
It isn't sweet that you know where she's been for the past three weekends because you scrolled through her entire Instagram history. Women don't find it endearing when they're having a conversation and you interject by saying, "Oh yeah, I know. You tweeted it last night." You're a stalker, dude. Let her live her online life. You may think you're appearing interested in what she has to say, but be easy before you get blocked.
Wear too much cologne
Women like their men to smell good, but dousing yourself in AXE body spray is never the right thing to do. How do you expect her to breathe when you're out here smelling like a 16-year-old kid headed to prom? What are you hiding under all of that cologne? Don't exacerbate her allergies with your overzealous use of fragrance, dude. Say it with us: A single spray is enough.
Blame her emotions on her period
Women get upset for a number of reasons and her menstrual cycle isn't always to blame for her anger or moodiness. There are many different symptoms of PMS and not every woman suffers from them. If she's pissed, chances are that something actually caused her anger besides her disgruntled uterus. You may think you're helping by suggesting that her mood swings are out of her control, but you're making things worse. Making her period the scapegoat for her emotions also suggests that she has no self-control and isn't thinking or behaving rationally. And we shouldn't have to tell you that's a bad look.
Fail to make eye contact
Look at her when she's talking to you, even if you're uninterested in what she's saying and you're not really listening. Zone out, daydream, think about your intramural basketball league tournament, but continue to make eye contact. It would be great if you were actually listening to her because she will test you on this later, but as long as your gaze is in her direction, you'll give her the illusion that you're present. Conversely, you could be listening to her intently, but she won't know it if you're staring at the television.
Tell her she didn't tell you something
When a woman ends a sentence with "remember?" the only acceptable answers if you don't recall what she's saying are "No, I forgot" or "No, I wasn't listening." It's never a good idea to tell a woman that she didn't tell you something that she knows she did. That's just playing the blame game, and the odds are typically in her favor, meaning the blame will fall on you.
Question her purchases
She needs that $40 moisturizer, each of those four dozen hair products, and those shoes that go with everything, and she's not letting go of her overpriced stylist because that's the only person she trusts with her blow-outs. What she chooses to spend her money on is of no concern to you if the two of you aren't sharing a bank account. Don't tell her that anything she's purchased cost too much (even if it does)—unless you're her accountant.
Play with her hair after she just got it done
She just complained about how much money it costs to get her hair done and you think it's a good idea to pet her? Hands off, man. She just subjected herself to torture via curling iron, and inhaled hairspray fumes for an hour to look this good. Please look and compliment, but don't touch.
Send unsolicited nude pictures of yourself
As unnecessary and inappropriate as you find cold calls from salespeople, women tend to find "dick pics" just as inconvenient. If you've never slept with her and you decide to send her a picture of your penis that she didn't ask for, you look creepy as hell. Stop it. And, if you have slept with her and have a great relationship, she already knows what your dick looks like. What she doesn't know is how to explain why she received that picture at lunchtime to the co-worker looking over her shoulder. You may think you're turning her on, but honestly, guys, it's not.
Ask for nude pictures
If the only time you text her a complete sentence is when you're requesting to have naked pictures sent to your inbox, you need to check yourself. Of all the things on her "To Do" list, taking nude selfies for you doesn't score very high. You know that women don't exist for your sexual pleasure, so don't treat them as if that's their sole purpose in your life. If she wants you to see her naked, don't worry, she'll make it happen.
Keep a tally of who they'd sleep with
Whether you're speaking with your girlfriend or just a lady you're cool with, revealing your most wanted list doesn't make for good conversation. You'll either make her jealous or make her think that you view women solely as sex objects. Save discussing the potential smash list for when you're with the homies, and use your conversation skills to engage in discourse that she'll actually enjoy. Unless she initiates the conversation. In that case, you both can trade notes.
Leave the toilet seat up
Women have been complaining about this for years, but for some reason men the world over are still leaving the toilet seat up. If you're in her space, or she's at your place, you need to lift the seat up, pee straight in without splashing, put the seat down and then flush the toilet. If she falls into the bowl in the middle of the night, she's not going to be a happy camper.
Call women "females"
All females welcomed, is it? Sure, no problem, but which kind? Any animal with the right chromosomal makeup can be classified as a female, so you'll have to be more specific, sir. A lot of guys don't see this as offensive, but when you refer to a woman as a female in a non-scientific context or use the word in parts of speech other than an adjective, well, that's sexist and dehumanizing. How about trying something more accurate like "woman." Or, you know, calling her by her name.
Initiate conversation then drift off
Don't hit a woman up just to get her attention, and then drift off once she replies. She responded, so she wants to talk, don't annoy her by going AWOL after the initial pleasantries. If you were wondering whether or not she has time for that, rest assured, she does not. A good way to circumvent this issue is by using your phone to call her. Smartphones can be used to do more than text and browse, you know.