Image via Complex Original
The selfie, it seems, is here to stay. Everyone from infants to grandparents is taking selfies. Heads of state and CEOs are taking selfies. "Selfie" was 2013's word of the year. With the possibility of great selfies comes great responsibility. In the age of the selfie, snapping a photo of yourself at the wrong time or in the wrong place can have dire consequences. Selfies have caused public ridicule, ruined relationships, and even landed people in jail. Be careful when you snap that selfie. That selfie could not only make you look very stupid, but it could have real world consequences. In case you're wondering what selfies to avoid, here are The Dumbest Selfies of All Time.
10. Keep You Eye on the Ball Selfie
Tampa Bay Ray's sideline reporter Kelly Nash came very close to becoming a little league cautionary tale: remember kids, always keep your eye on the ball. To be fair to Nash, this wasn't during a game (that would make her a pretty poor sideline reporter if it were); a ball went rogue during batting practice and almost beaned Nash. Nash said, "Producer Art Dryce had called out 'heads up!' a few times while I was taking pictures around the left field section, but none of those balls actually fell close to me, so I took my chances turning my back on batting practice for a picture." Can you really blame her though? We all know that selfies are a high risk / high reward proposition, and a selfie that flirts with danger can often yield the most likes.
9. Grandma's Casket Selfie
There have been enough funeral selfies to spawn a Tumblr dedicated to the art form. Though any funeral selfie is inappropriate, this particular funeral selfie is in the running for GOAT. Every funeral selfie is insensitive, but does every funeral selfie have a casket in the deep background? You could make the argument that this burgeoning photographic artist is making some kind of comment on the futility of human existence, or perhaps he's just a clueless dick: either way, we approve.
8. Pulled Over Selfie
It's hard to imagine a cop letting you off with a warning after he catches you taking a selfie. Of course, this became an Internet trend for a while, as most stupid things do. We have to imagine that maximum fines for selfie-takers is a trend among police officers as well.
7. The Selfie Tattoo Selfie
We wanted to remember her as she lived, standing in front of her bathroom mirror preparing to to give the gift of duck face to the world.
6. I Just Got Stabbed Selfie
After a good stabbing, you'll hate Monday's more than Garfield. This is not the only post-stabbing selfie that has hit the Internet. Nat Scimio posted a selfie after he was hospitalized as a result of the recent Pittsburgh area high school stabbing. The key difference between the two selfies is that Nate waited until he was bandaged up at the hospital to snap his selfie. Call us old fashioned, but we believe hospital then selfie feels like the right order of events.
5. Kicked By A Train Selfie
We have confirmation that this selfie is real and it is glorious. Internet selfie conspiracy theorists initially felt that this selfie was a hoax. After all, we do live in the age of the Kimmel twerk fail. The Washington Post's Caitlin Dewey dug into the situation and found that all of this was very real. She spoke to globetrotting YouTuber Jared Michael who told her that this is a slow-moving train on a winding tourist road toward Machu Picchu. Dewey wrote, "the leg from Ollantaytambo to Machu Picchu takes an hour and a half, and it's only about 26 miles. So the train that hit Michael moves at an average speed of 17 mph — way, way slower than the speeds typical of passenger trains in the U.S., and a little more than half the speed of your average flying soccer ball."
4. Nelson Mandeal Funeral Selfie
Most of us can get away with taking a poorly timed selfie without feeling the heat of the entire world. President Obama, however, isn't so lucky. Look, if we saw Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt in the bar, we might try to snap a selfie as well. She is a certified Nordic cougar. But, Barack, Nelson Mandela's funeral was probably the wrong place to get your selfie game on. Don't be too hard on POTUS; Michelle came down hard enough on him. After the selfie, Michelle made him switch seats and we imagine there was more punishment behind closed doors, and not the kind that inspires political fan fiction.
3. Drug Mule Selfie
Being a drug mule sounds like a pretty straight forward job. Pick up drugs; sometimes put drugs inside of you; deliver drugs. There are few things you can do to complicate the process outside of sampling the goods. One of those things would be taking a selfie. After two drug addicts were found with cocaine on their person, it was easy to link 26 year-old Briton Peter Cavanagh to the crime after peeping his mobile phone and finding a picture of him flashing fat stacks on the train.
2. Post-Bank Robbery Selfie
If you're going to rob a bank, it is rarely a good idea to take a selfie afterwards. Jules Bahler, who goes by King Romeo on social media (branding is important for criminals BTW), learned this lesson the hard way. After robbing a bank, King Romeo posted this selfie accompanied by this missive to his subjects, "Bought my first house and chopper today ... lifes [sic] great." It bears mentioning that the King had only stolen $7,000, so that must have been a low-end house-chopper combo.
1. Ice-Cream-After-Successfully-Defending-George-Zimmerman Selfie
How do you celebrate helping a racist vigilante nutjob get away with murder? I wouldn’t have guessed vanilla ice cream and selfies either, but that is exactly what happened. Just in case the symbolism of vanilla ice cream is a bit too lit. class for you, here is the caption penned by attorney Don West’s daughter Molly. “We beat stupidity celebration cones. #zimmerman #defense #dadkilledit.” Yes, we dare say #dadkilledit like Zimmerman killed Trayvon Martin.