Image via Complex Original
If we're being honest and measured in our assessment, R. Kelly's recent Sway In the Morning freestyle is just plain OK. It's funny and refreshing to hear the man's increasingly rare falsetto, but this particular stream of consciousness about black panties and tongue sounds isn't R. Kelly's best work.
If you're not familiar with R. Kelly's very best R&B freestyles, allow me to unlock the vault. R. Kelly's been the king of R&B freestyle since there ever was such a thing.
Justin Charity is a staff writer for Complex. Follow him @BrotherNumpsa.
Freestyle at Nassau Colliseum (2007)
"After 17 yeeeeeeeee-aaars," R. Kelly sings, "y'all motherfuckers keep calling me." And that, my friends, is the tender gusto of a proper R&B freestyle.
"Transformers 3" Freestyle f/ Tyrese (2010)
In 2010, Tyrese invited R. Kelly to the Hollywood set of Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Naturally, the duo recorded a poorly lit acoustic duet in a conspicuously evacuated restaurant. I don't know what to make of this one. "Leeeeeee-ooooooonnnnnnnnnnn," R. Kelly sings.
"Love Letter" Freestyle (2011)
Is R. Kelly sniffing blue panties on stage in New Orleans? "I want to make a deal with the ladies," he says, before outlining the rules of strip poker. "You go first," he insists.
"Sex Dolphin" Freestyle (2013)
Like T-Pain singing about mermaid sex on Saturday Night Live four years earlier, Rolling Stone for real got R. Kelly to sing, "I wanna be your ice hockey player, your dragon-slayer, girrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-l" in hi-def. May God shine upon everyone involved.
"5 Fingers Of Death" Freestyle (2015)
"I'm not a freestyler," he sings. "I'm not a freeee-styyyyy-lerrrrrr, noooooooooo."