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50 Cent may not be your favorite rapper. He's not the greatest actor—or the world's best boss. But everyone agrees that 50 is the absolute best when it comes to taunting, bragging, and talking that shit. Well, everyone besides Ja Rule. And Irv Gotti. And Shyne. And Nas. And Fat Joe. And DJ Khaled. And Game. And Young Buck. And Lil' Wayne. And Jay-Z. And Kanye. And Charli Baltimore. And Ashanti. And Cam'Ron. And Q. And Diddy. And Rick Ross. And Jimmy Iovine.... So while you wait for his new mixtape to drop—The Lost Tape's release was just pushed back to next week—join us as It's The Real walks that walk, Ferrari F50 talks that talk, and Complex presents The 25 Best 50 Cent Rants.
Written by Eric Rosenthal & Jeff Rosenthal (@ItsTheReal)
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25. "PIMP"
Date: Feburary 2003
Target: Slow girls
Best Line(s): "They say I talk a little fast, but if you listen a little faster I ain't gotta slow down for you to catch up, bitch."
Starting with his debut album, Get Rich or Die Trying, 50 stated loud and clear that no failure would ever be his fault. If you don't understand 50 or his rationale, that's your fault. If you don't get his music, you're not smart enough. If you've come to a different conclusion than 50, you're insane. If a tree falls in the woods, but 50 Cent didn't cut it down, it never happened. We're just getting started but catch up, bitch.
24. "Here I Am"
Date: August 2008
Target: Rick Ross
Best Line(s): "It's the kid, 50. Not the fire department. Not the cops. [Laughs]"
Six months before his and 50's feud would officially start—a seeming eternity in RSS feed time—Rick Ross was in the middle of a very rough summer as he battled rumors claiming that he was a one-time corrections officer. (For the record: he was.) So 50 jumped on one of Rozay's tracks, taking a few shots of his own at Officer Roberts. (Related: shooting at a police officer is a felony, which could net you jail time under the supervision of a corrections officer.)
23. 50 Squashes Beef With Canadian Hater
Date: July 2009
Target: Pruane2Forever
Best Line(s): "Today is Friday, you understand? And Friday is the only day that he can't have a hundred hoes on him, you understand? So he's chillin'."
Of all the beefs 50 has engaged in over the years, nothing compares to the time a geeky Canadian rap blogger threw some YouTube hate in his direction back in 2009. Apparently Pruane2Forever felt "Fiddy" was selling out when the rapper discussed plans to manufacture a dildo based off his, uh, likeness.
The raspy-mouthed kid from Vancouver was immediately flown to the G-Unit offices, where 50—rather than squashing the buck-toothed Canuck's face in—squashed any and all ill will and kinda sorta put the kid down with his team, even though he was obviously clowning the kid all the while. This might've been the only beef that 50 ever ended voluntarily.
22. "Realest Killaz"
Date: November 2003
Target: Ja Rule
Best Line(s): "Nigga, you ain't Tupac!"
And to think, people used to say Ja Rule was too much like DMX.
21. "Emotional"
Date: December 2005
Target: Game
Best Line(s): "You work for me; you're a disgruntled employee...for the next four albums!"
Nine months into a feud that seemed to escalate by the day, 50—who had already kicked Game out of G-Unit—stated that crew affiliation meant nothing as long as papers were signed. Each paycheck delivered to Game would include line-item deductions for state taxes, federal withholding, and Curtis Jackson.
20. "Clap Back Interlude"
Date: November 2003
Target: Ja Rule
Best Line(s): “I think I'm going to have go see the minister and explain to him why I can't let up off you. It's against my religion to let a nigga survive. When you destroy, you destroy completely, bitch.”
In an effort to quell the rising tensions between G-Unit and Murder, Inc., Ja Rule traveled to Minister Farrakhan's Illinois farm in 2003. Worried about the tension boiling over, Russell Simmons also stepped in, leading 50 to counsel with Manhattan's Mosque Number Seven. Apparently, the meeting didn't accomplish much; weeks later 50 dropped a tape called "No Peace Talks."
19. "The Bomb"
Date: September 2006
Target: Diddy
Best Line(s): "Now you go ahead and send me $50,000 for this nigga's travel fees, you know, air fare, hotel space, for that last tour."
As early as September 2005, Ma$e was walking around in a G-Unit spinner chain, posted on G-Unit mixtape covers and recording on G-Unit studio time. What a difference a year makes. 364 days after 50 told MTV that Ma$e was "perfect," he dropped the song "The Bomb," ranting in Puff's direction for owed money, presumably because he had to lug Diddy's former artist around on tour. A better solution: get Pastor Ma$e to pass around the collection plate.
18. 50 vs. Fat Joe
Date: September 2009
Target: Fat Joe
Best Line(s): "Fat Joe is the worst thing that ever happened to hip-hop. And it hurts, because I love hip-hop."
One thing about 50 Cent, he may be slightly prone to exaggeration—especially when he's determined to bury an opponent. The bandages on his face are a dead giveaway that 50's back on that bullshit. While watching this video, ask yourself whether Fat Joe's music was really to blame for these hilarious—if not dangerous—situations. You have been warned!
17. Threatening To Leak "Detox"
Date: July 2011
Target: Interscope
Best Line(s): "I LOVE DRE but I'm putting his next single psycho out tomorrow at 2:00 #SK…"
Since 2001, Dr. Dre has dangled Detox in front of his fans like a carrot on a stick—yet eleven years later the album remains a giant tease, looming juuuuust beyond the horizon. After all the endless build-up, 50 threatened to leak his boss's masterwork like it was some regular mp3 for the blogs, just to prove a point to his record label. Revenge is a dish best served **EXCLUSIVE**.
16. "Heat"
Date: Feburary 2003
Target: N/A
Best Line(s): "Doc says if I get hit I might get a fucking concussion, well better that than a hole in the head, right nigga?"
It's easy to write off 50's insistence on having bullet-proof everything as a marketing gimmick (which to some extent, it certainly was). But remember, he really did get shot a bunch of times, so any paranoia might not be completely unfounded. You'd probably be a lot like him if A) You had that much money and B) Your bones still hurt every time it rained.
15. "Play This On The Radio"
Date: January 2009
Target: Lil' Wayne
Best Line(s): "Don't end up on the fucking list, nigga. Be a missing person, like Cam'ron, like Ja, like Joe."
Who says 50's not generous? After Lil' Wayne threw a shot 50's way—"I'm all about a dollar, fuck two quarters / Bitch I'll pour syrup in that Vitamin Water"—50 gave out some free advice: fuck with 50, and he'll personally end your career (see Ja Rule, Fat Joe, and Cam'Ron). Spoiler alert: 50 and Wayne ended up posing for pictures together, after Floyd Mayweather's triumph in Las Vegas, May 5, 2012. So, all's well that end's well?
14. 50 Catches Wreck On The Angie Martinez Show
Date: September 2009
Target: Kanye and Jay-Z
Best Line(s): "I'm the greatest show on Earth, Ang."
50 Cent is like a walking, talking three-ring circus. He plays with fire, he walks a tightrope, he clowns around-and the listener always leaves entertained. Just sit him in front of a mic and toss him topics like "Kanye and Lady Gaga," "Jay-Z being a punk," and "Lil' Mama knowing better than to jump on stage when 50 is there." The man knows how to juggle.
13. 50 vs. Triple C's
Date: November 2009
Target: Triple C's
Best Line(s): "Motherfuckers sell 4,000 CDs, man... it's bad out here, man."
According to Wikipedia, the term "crocodile tears" refers to "an ancient anecdote that crocodiles weep in order to lure their prey, or that they cry for the victims they are eating." Regardless of whether Crocodile 50 was crying to get the Carol City Cartel, or because he got them, the fact remains that they got got: Triple C's were never heard from again.
12. "Banks Victory"
Date: March 2004
Target: Dudes in the projects
Best Line(s): "And your mama said I'm supposed to tell you something, to encourage you; somethin' positive. Well, I ain't gonna lie to you motherfucker, he ain't going nowhere. Fuckin' dirtbag"
To all those wondering... 50 is NOT a motivational speaker. TELL 'EM FIF!
11. 50 Drops Knowledge On "Cocaine City" DVD
Date: June 2008
Target: N/A
Best Line(s): "Y'all niggas love me. They love me. You know why they love me? They think like me. They feel it. And even after I play basketball, they smell like me."
Forget college. If you want to move ahead in life, make sure to watch this video of noted author 50 Cent making a cameo appearance on the street DVD, Cocaine City. He gives away about 36 of the 50 Laws of Power.
10. "Body On It"
Date: December 2011
Target: Everyone who thinks 50 fell off
Best Line(s): "If a nigga say I fell off, I just want you to ask him when. What they gon' say, what? The Curtis album? Okay, so number-one's not good enough?"
With the release of Get Rich or Die Tryin', 50 Cent was immediately thrust into the upper-limits of pop superstardom. He had a choice to make: stay in South Jamaica, or expand the empire. He chose the latter, pressing up gold plaques for "Ayo Technology" instead of holding down the concrete.
9. "Funeral Music"
Date: Feburary 2007
Target: Cam'ron, Dipset
Best Line(s): "What's the last Cam joint you liked? 'Computers putin', boopity-booping.'"
With Cam'ron and KOCH Records' boss Alan Grunblatt holding on the line, Angie Martinez asked 50, "What's your relationship with Cam?" He responded, "We don't have problems." Surprise—they did! 50 had previously said Koch Records was a graveyard (where artists like Styles P, another enemy of 50's at the time, were sent to die). Cam'ron was not cool with that. So imagine how he felt about 50 jacking his nursery-rhyme jibber-jabber flow for comedic effect.
8. "Not Rich, Still Lying"
Date: April 2006
Target: Game
Best Line(s): "Didn't you say that you woke up out of a coma in 2001? / Well, your brother said you were never in a coma. DAMN!"
In 2006, Game was battling on a few fronts: aside from the G-Unot shirts, he and his brother Big Fase Hunned had fallen out. (To make matters worse, Fase was quick to give interviews picking apart the legends Game had told about himself.) To be fair, Game and the truth have a very complicated relationship—maybe he wasn't lying; maybe he was having a Change of Heart.
7. "Pimpin' Curly"
Date: Febuary 2009
Target: Rick Ross
Best Line(s): "Nigga, you don't know a pimp when you see a motherfucking pimp, 'cause I bought a bitch a couple of fur coats, nigga?"
Like the actor Sacha Baron Cohen, when 50 takes on a role, he delves all the way into the character. So when Rick Ross referred to 50 as "Curly"—way back at the beginning of their beef-50 took the name and owned it. Turning himself into the over-the-top hustler, Pimpin' Curly, 50 starred in a series of videos. Also like Baron Cohen, 50 could only play the same character for only so long before it became passe.
6. "I Smell Pussy"
Date: November 2003
Target: Murder, Inc.
Best Line(s): "And that bitch Charli Baltimore, bitch look like she died last week, pale as fuck."
School children should be forced to memorize this screed in its entirety. This speech should be the new pledge of allegiance, a call to attention as each day begins. 50 roasts each and every member of Murder Inc-limb by limb, ligament by ligament-until all that's left is blood and bone. The funny bone, that is.
5. 50 Hijacks The Def Jam Conference Call
Date: August 2010
Target: Shyne
Best Line: "You can't go to war from a fucking island!"
In this day and age, it's easy to share feelings and emotions via social platforms like Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, and Instagram. And that just makes it all the more exciting when someone like 50 Cent share his thoughts using an old-school form of communication: the telephone. Especially when it's a phone call he's not invited to participate in. And especially when he keeps yelling profanities.
4. "I Run New York"
Date: 2005
Target: Diddy, D-Block, Fat Joe
Best Line(s): "Tell the nigga Puffy I said get out the mirror, for a second; lemme talk to him. Puffy own the nigga motherfucking publishing."
If there's one thing 50 does really well, it's get money—not long before this particular rant, Coca-Cola bought Vitamin Water for $4.1B, putting $100M in 50's already fat wallet. Oh, and he also beefs with people. So, that's two things he does really well. Which brings us to Diddy, Fat Joe and The LOX, all of whom he was sending shots at for different and long-standing reasons. (Puffy's business deals; Fat Joe and Jadakiss for guesting on a Ja Rule song.) In an effort to wipe them all out at once, 50 simply smeared them all together.
3. 50 vs. Worldstar
Date: January 2011
Target: WorldStarHipHop
Best Line(s): "Don't wassup me, you sucka; I should black your eye."
The idea of "internet tough" used to be a joke. But things got serious when 50, who comes from the school of shutting shit down, claimed to do just that to the video site WorldstarHipHop.com. Feeling that his image was being illegally used in the site's advertisements, Fifty called up the Angie Martinez Show to not-so delicately hash things out with Worldstar's CEO, Q, providing us all with lots of LOLs.
2. "Southside"
Date: August 2007
Target: Jimmy Iovine
Best Line(s): "Niggas think Jimmy Iovine's my boss. Nigga, FUCK Jimmy Iovine, nigga! I'm from a hundred thirty fourth street, nigga! I AIN'T GOT NO MOTHERFUCKIN BOSS!"
If you were 50 Cent and you came to the conclusion that you and your record label were not on the same page, what would you do? Hurl some shots at the label's celebrated CEO in a mixtape song, in which you compare yourself to the man some would argue to be the worst president of the United States? Oh really? Yeah, 50 did that too.
1. "Order of Protection/Cocaine Dreams"
Date: 2003
Target: Ja Rule
Best Line(s): "Order of protection? From who? Who I need an order of protection from?"
One day Ja Rule and Irv Gotti got sick and tired of being antagonized by 50, so they decided to get their Woodward and Bernstein on, digging up what they claimed was an Order of Protection, supposedly requested by Curtis Jackson. When the papers turned out to be fake, 50 went in.