Life

7 things people who put self-growth first do differently

When you're in constant pursuit of a better version of yourself, your life looks different.

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There are two types of people in the world: those who actively pursue self-growth, and those who (perhaps subconsciously) deny it.

Everyone is evolving; everyone is growing. Whether we acknowledge it or not is up to the individual, but none of us get to circumvent the process. The lives of people who embrace change—allow it, seek it out, and believe it’s integral to life—may look unconventional, but that's to be expected. Where there's growth, there's deviation from the norm.


If you're all about growth, these behaviors will likely be second nature to you. If you're not—but want that to change—consider this list a handy guide.

1. They see life as a game.

People who prioritize self-growth see life as a series of challenges that help them evolve. Everything that happens is an opportunity to adjust their worldview, accounting for new experiences and lessons. When personal growth is the desired outcome, they process a potentially negative or traumatic experience by extracting the lesson, moving on, and applying it to life. They understand that there's a larger meaning to pain, suffering, and emotional blocks.

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2. They are not afraid of failure.

People who pursue self-growth experiment more often because they're not scared of unexpected outcomes. They spend less time hedging and overthinking because they know the best things come from action. Whether these people win or lose, fail or succeed, they understand that growth earned through experimentation is the real prize. They're not as consumed with controlling outcomes; instead, they would rather follow their intuition, see what happens, and learn from the experience.

3. They seek out discomfort.

People who embrace self-growth are more likely to put themselves in new and uncomfortable situations because they refuse to remain complacent. Growing pains are real, and these people don't shy away from them. They continuously put themselves in positions that others may view as too risky because they know that’s where the real evolving happens. Sure, shedding old layers can be unsettling, but it’s always worth it.

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4. They don't avoid negative emotions.

They allow themselves to experience a range of emotions, as only holding on to a handful of positive ones does nothing for personal growth. There's always something to learn from anger, sadness, despair, and shame, so people who put self-growth first allow these feelings to surface. They embrace each emotion with a curious mind and desire to learn more about themselves.

5. They are their own ally.

They don't judge themselves for what they "should" do to keep growing. Personal growth requires a sense of openness that leaves no room for self-judgment, so it can't happen if you're bogged down by a self-imposed checklist. Growth is not a straight line, and people who desire evolvement allow for curves—even if it means a life that looks very different from the lives of others.

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6. They don’t care about being accepted.

They make decisions that are sometimes misunderstood by other people. Perhaps they need to move across the country, change jobs, leave a relationship, or any number of drastic life changes. It may seem strange to everyone else, but those who care about self-growth make these decisions with gusto, knowing that sticking to old beliefs will never help them evolve. Sometimes the only way to grow is to discard whatever is keeping you small.

7. They focus on what they can control.

People who prioritize self-growth understand that they can't control what happens in life, but know they can control their reaction to what happens. They choose to believe that life is happening for them, not against them. They see lessons instead of roadblocks. They choose peace and self-examination over resentment and confusion. And they never give up on who they can become; instead, they look to the horizon, and keep walking.

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